Girls To Grow

Nurturing moms in their walk with God

How to Make the Journey from Fear to Faith

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Hello and welcome to Girls to Grow! It’s a beautiful fall afternoon here. And while I’m not a fan of how early in the evening it gets dark now, I do love that we’re back to it being light earlier in the mornings.

I’ve almost finished Priscilla Shirer’s Bible study on Elijah. This week we’ve looked at how Elijah ran from Jezebel and her death threat in 1 Kings 19. That led to a deeper look at other Bible characters who found themselves in a place of fear but were able to journey through it to faith.

Let’s look at three examples.

Three examples of people in the Bible who moved from fear to faith and how we can do the same.

Jacob.

He was running from his brother Esau who was plotting to kill him. [Genesis 27:41] His mother’s plan was to send him to visit her family until Esau’s anger passed. Jacob was off on a journey to an unknown land to stay with unfamiliar people. On the way, he encountered God.

“And behold, the Lord…said, ‘…I am with thee, and will keep thee in all places whither thou goest, and will bring thee again into this land; for I will not leave thee, until I have done that which I have spoken to thee of.‘” ~Genesis 28:13-15

Moses.

He used to be a prince living in a palace. Now he’s a shepherd out in the middle of nowhere. Moses once thought he could help his people break free from their bondage, but his way hadn’t worked. Until he encountered God, in the midst of a burning bush.

“Come now, therefore, and I will send thee unto Pharaoh, that thou mayest bring forth my people the children of Israel out of Egypt.” ~Exodus 3:10

Gideon.

The Israelites are in bondage to the Midianites. Gideon and his father are threshing wheat in hiding so that the enemy won’t come and take it away. [Judges 6:11] Then Gideon encountered God.

“And the Lord looked upon him, and said, “Go in this thy might, and thou shalt save Israel from the hand of the Midianites: have not I sent thee?…Surely I will be with thee, and thou shalt smite the Midianites…’” ~Judges 6:14, 16

How did these men get victory on the other side? How did they go from a place of fear or uncertainty to living out God’s plan for them?

They trusted God. They believed what He told them and acted on it.

Let’s revisit each of them.

Jacob.

“…If God will be with me, and will keep me in this way that I go…then shall the Lord be my God.” ~Genesis 28:20, 21

What does Jacob come back and say later on in his life? “…O God of my father Abraham, and God of my father Isaac…I am not worthy of the least of all thy mercies, and of all the truth, which thou hast shewed unto thy servant…” ~Genesis 32:9, 10

Moses.

Did it take Moses a minute or two to work through what God wanted him to do? Oh yes. But in Exodus 4:20, he returns to Egypt with the rod of God in his hand. And what does Moses say on the banks of the Red Sea with the Egyptian army breathing down his neck?

“And Moses said unto the people, ‘Fear ye not, stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord, which he will shew to you today: for the Egyptians whom ye have seen today, ye shall see them again no more for ever.‘” ~Exodus 14;13

Gideon.

He has gathered an army, seen it shrink, then overheard a man telling about his dream that Gideon would defeat the Midianites.

“And it was so, when Gideon heard the telling of the dream…that he worshipped, and returned unto the host of Israel, and said, ‘Arise: for the Lord hath delivered into your hand the host of Midian.‘” ~Judges 7:15

Each of them believed what God said. They had faith that God would keep His Word, that He was faithful to His promise.

What’s your struggle today? Are you running from a certain situation? Are you afraid of following through on something God’s asked you to do?

God has a promise for you in His Word. Could one of these be what you need today?

Do you have a need for God to meet? “But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.” ~Philippians 4:19

Do you feel left alone by God? “…for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.” ~Hebrews 13:5

Do you want wisdom? “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.” ~James 1:5

How about strength? “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.” Philippians 4:13

Desire victory over fear? “Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.” ~Isaiah 41:10

I’ll end with an example from Paul’s life in 2 Corinthians 1:8-10.

“For we would not, brethren, have you ignorant of our trouble which came to us in Asia, that we were pressed out of measure, above strength, insomuch that we despaired even of life: But we had the sentence of death in ourselves, that we should not trust in ourselves, but in God which raiseth the dead: Who delivered us from so great a death, and doth deliver: in whom we trust that he will yet deliver us;”

They trusted in God. He delivered. And they continued to trust that He would deliver them in the future.

Claim a promise from God’s Word and trust Him to be faithful to keep it. May God help us as Christian women in 2021 to rely on His promises and trust Him for every need today and for those that are ahead.

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5 Revealing Characteristics of a Foolish Woman

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Hello, friends, and welcome to autumn! The weather is definitely supposed to feel more fall-like here over the next few days, and I’m looking forward to that. I’m not ready for coats and boots yet, but a little sweater weather would be nice 🙂

Recently I was trying out a new recipe. The instructions said to put a certain group of ingredients in the food processor. However, I didn’t want to drag that heavy thing out from under the counter and then have to clean it when I was done. The blender was much easier to access in the pantry and I could easily throw it in the dishwasher afterward.

That all sounded like a great plan until I got the ingredients into the blender. And then I realized that there was almost no liquid in there…meaning the ingredients probably weren’t going to come together like they were supposed to. At that point, I wasn’t about to dump it all into the food processor and start over. I *may* have gone off script and added a little liquid to make it work.

It came out okay in the end, but in retrospect, I can see how the food processor would have worked better. Full disclosure: I feel like a lot of my cooking and baking adventures go this way. I do something wrong the first time and learn from that what not to do the next time!

There are times when we can learn the right way to do something by studying what not to do. I think we’d all agree that we want to be wise women. So today I thought we’d look at what characterizes a foolish woman to see how we don’t want to act.

Based on different Bible verses, here are five characteristics of a foolish woman.

Are you a wise or foolish woman? Check out these five characteristics of a foolish woman and see if you recognize any of them in your own life.

1. She won’t listen to instruction.

“The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge: but fools despise wisdom and instruction.” ~Proverbs 1:7

A foolish woman isn’t teachable. She wants her own way. She doesn’t seek wisdom from God’s Word or from Godly people in her life.

I think we can throw stubbornness in here, too. Proverbs 7:11 describes the strange woman as stubborn. If you want to be a foolish woman, refuse to change your mind even when there are good reasons to do so. Don’t yield to anyone else’s direction, regardless of the circumstances.

2. She tears down her house.

“Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.” ~Proverbs 14:1

I’ve done some digging to try to discover what that phrase means – the foolish woman plucks her house down with her hands. Obviously, it’s not talking about her physical house, but her home. It would be actions that damage her family’s well-being.

Things that come to mind are living above her means, spending money that they don’t have. Maybe she fails to manage the household well; she neglects her children and doesn’t provide the things that would make them feel safe. And there’s certainly the spiritual side of it as well. If she doesn’t prioritize living out and teaching God’s Word, she is failing to build the spiritual foundation they need for life.

3. She doesn’t accept everything as from God’s hand.

“Then said his wife unto him, Dost thou still retain thine integrity? curse God, and die. But he said unto her, Thou speakest as one of the foolish women speaketh. What? shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil? In all this did not Job sin with his lips.” ~Job 2:9-10

Wow, Job had it so right here. His wife’s perspective was, “How can you still believe in a God that would allow all these terrible things to happen to you?”

Is that how we want to be, doubting God’s love and goodness when a trial comes along? That’s the way of the foolish woman.

4. She has no control over her tongue.

“The tongue of the wise useth knowledge aright: but the mouth of fools poureth out foolishness.” ~Proverbs 15:2

Like water pouring out of a pitcher, a foolish woman just lets words spill out of her mouth. We could say that she doesn’t have a filter or that she speaks before she thinks.

Honestly, this can be an easy trap to fall into. Usually, the more we talk, the more opportunities we have to say something we shouldn’t. And thoughtlessly spoken words can hurt others.

5. She gets angry easily.

 “Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools.” ~Ecclesiastes 7:9

Just like the foolish woman doesn’t control her tongue, neither does she control her emotions. She blows up over little things. Maybe her family tiptoes around her until they’ve assessed what her mood is that day.

Nothing good comes from having a short fuse. A sign of a foolish woman is one who has a quick temper and is easily offended.

As we see these five qualities of a foolish woman, let’s ask God to point out any that have taken root in our own lives. With His help, we can become wise women who bless our families and honor Him.

Can you think of other traits that a foolish woman might have? Let me know in the comments below!

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4 Defeating Thoughts and How to Overcome Them

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Welcome to Girls to Grow today, whether you’re a first-time or long-time reader! I hope your summer’s going well so far and that you had a good 4th of July holiday weekend. It’s a fairly quiet week here, so we’re fitting in a couple of routine doctor appointments and starting the dorm-room shopping process with my younger daughter.

Lately, I’ll admit to having to work hard to keep my thoughts positive. It seems like I run to the negative side of things very quickly! I get down on myself or someone else. Or I dwell on what’s wrong in a situation rather than choosing to trust God and His timing.

But I know that’s not how God would have for us to live. He wants us to walk in His truth. In order to do that, we need to fight those negative thoughts with God’s Word. It is our sword [Ephesians 6:17], and we can use it to get victory over those thoughts.

Here are four common defeating thought patterns along with Scripture to overcome them.

We can fight against the negative thoughts that discourage us by using truth from God's Word.

1. I’ve messed up too many times for God to still love me.

Saved or unsaved, you can have this thought. Let’s remind ourselves about some truths regarding God’s love for us.

“Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.” ~1 John 4:10 We weren’t the ones to initiate love towards God. He loved us first.

“But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” ~Romans 5:8 So often we think of love as conditional. As imperfect humans, it can be hard to grasp that God’s love was so great that He loved us and sent His Son to die for us while we were still in our sinful state, far from wanting the redemption we needed.

“The Lord hath appeared of old unto me, saying, Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee.” ~Jeremiah 31:3 God’s love is everlasting. Nothing can separate us from that love. [Romans 8:38-39]

2. God doesn’t know or care about the little things in my life.

We get discouraged, and while we know in our heads this isn’t true, our hearts may feel differently. Thankfully feelings don’t equal truth.

“Are not five sparrows sold for two farthings, and not one of them is forgotten before God? But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows.” ~Luke 12:6-7 The God who remembers every sparrow and knows the number of hairs on your head knows and cares about every detail of your life.

“How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! how great is the sum of them! If I should count them, they are more in number than the sand: when I awake, I am still with thee.” ~Psalm 139:17-18 What an idea to meditate on – God’s thoughts about me are precious and more in number than the sand!

“The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and he delighteth in his way.” ~Psalm 37:23 God knows not just our whole path, but each step that we’re taking along the way.

3. No one else has the same struggles that I do.

This one has come up often for me as a mom. Other moms seem to have this whole parenting thing down way better than I do! She doesn’t seem to struggle with __________ [insert whatever difficult behavior my child is currently displaying]. But we can also allow this thought to defeat us when it comes to any type of temptation or difficulty we’re facing.

“There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.” ~1 Corinthians 10:13 This verse is pretty clear – temptation is common to all of us. Yet God knows what we can handle and makes a way of escape for us.

“For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin.” ~Hebrews 4:15 Jesus, all-God yet all-man, understands what it’s like to live on this earth with its trials and temptations.

“For in that he himself hath suffered being tempted, he is able to succour them that are tempted.” ~Hebrews 2:18 We can run to Christ for comfort and support. We don’t have to do it alone.

4. My prayers aren’t doing any good.

Have you ever prayed for something that, as far as you know, is in God’s will, but it doesn’t seem to get answered?

“Now we know that God heareth not sinners: but if any man be a worshipper of God, and doeth his will, him he heareth.” ~John 9:31 The Bible says over and over that God hears our prayers.

“And this is the confidence that we have in him, that, if we ask any thing according to his will, he heareth us:” ~1 John 5:14 If we don’t see our prayer answered right away, it doesn’t mean that God hasn’t heard us. We can’t know the mind of God, but we can trust that He is working out what is best.

“And when he had taken the book, the four beasts and four and twenty elders fell down before the Lamb, having every one of them harps, and golden vials full of odours, which are the prayers of saints.” ~Revelation 5:8 I love this verse that tells us that our prayers are before God as sweet incense!

And finally, in 1 Thessalonians 5:17, we’re instructed to pray without ceasing. Why would we be told to do this if our prayers don’t do any good?

Let’s be purposeful about choosing our thoughts today. If the defeating thought you’re facing isn’t on this list, find a Bible verse that will help you overcome it. May we use God’s Word to live victoriously as Christian women today.

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5 Simple Things to Do Today to Be a Wise Woman

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Welcome to the blog on this mid-May morning! We’ve done a switcheroo at our house this week – our older daughter is now home from college while our younger daughter is off on her Senior trip for eight days. One thing’s for certain about this season of life; things are always changing!

As part of my morning Bible time, I review passages of Scripture that I’ve memorized in the past. I’ve recently started using the Verses app to do this and I’m really enjoying it. This week I’m working on Proverbs 31, which leads me to the topic of today’s post.

I’m always inspired and yet convicted by this chapter. The virtuous woman described here seems to have it all together in every area of her life. And yet I know myself and, let’s just say that I don’t. But I want to become more like her if that means I’ll be a blessing to my family and a better testimony for my Savior.

I’ve done a deeper dive into this passage in the past, but today I just wanted to choose five very practical things each of us can do today that can help us become more like this virtuous woman.

Check out these five things we can learn from the Proverbs 31 woman and see how we can apply them to our lives today.

1. Be dependable.

“The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.” ~Verse 11

It doesn’t take any special skill or particular talent to be dependable. Anyone can do it. It’s just a matter of ensuring that other people can trust you because you do what you say you will do.

In this particular verse, it’s referring to her husband being able to rely on her. He knows his wife is responsible. He doesn’t have to worry about how she’s running their home. Could our husbands say this about us – that we are trustworthy and faithful when it comes to managing the resources we have?

2. Take care of your body.

“She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.” ~Verse 17

In the New Testament, we’re told that our body is the temple of the Holy Ghost. [1 Corinthians 6:19-20] We only get one body. In order to accomplish all that’s on this woman’s list, she has to be strong. There’s no way a woman could do all these things if she’s not in good health mentally, physically, and emotionally.

We all know what to do. Sleep. Drink water. Eat well. Move our bodies in some way. But let this be our encouragement to set aside time to take care of ourselves on a regular basis.

3. Look for someone you can help.

“She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.” ~Verse 20

This doesn’t have to be a big, noteworthy deed. Just keep your eyes open as you go through your day. Notice people. More than money, someone may just need a smile or a word of encouragement. Seek to bless others.

4. Think before you speak.

“She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.” ~Verse 26

This may be the one I most aspire to – consistently speaking with wisdom and kindness. Too often that’s not how my words would be described. I think especially of how I want my children to remember the ways in which I spoke to them. We certainly need the Holy Spirit’s help to control our tongue.

5. Use your time wisely.

“She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.” ~Verse 27

There are lots of things that can take up our time. Mine tends to be Instagram scrolling (which is why I try to limit how many people I follow there). Maybe you get wrapped up in Facebook or Netflix. It’s okay to take some time to relax and recharge, but let’s be purposeful about it. This woman knew what was going on in her home and with her people because she stayed engaged and wasn’t lazy.

Can you focus on one or more of these as you go throughout your day? Are there other ways the virtuous woman is described that inspire you? While we may not feel like we can check off many of her traits in our own lives, may God help us to continue growing in each of these areas.

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How to Praise God When Life Is Difficult

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It’s hard to believe we’re closing out March today! We’ve definitely had some spring-like weather here lately. I walk outside in our neighborhood most days, and it’s been fun to see which trees and plants are newly blooming and budding each week.

Our focus on the blog this month has been praising God. We’ll close out this series today by focusing on how we can praise God when life is difficult.

There’s a long list of things that can make certain seasons of life hard. Let’s list some of them.

  • sickness – your own or a family member’s
  • death of someone you love
  • job loss
  • financial troubles
  • discouragement
  • disappointment
  • frustration with a current situation
  • marriage problems
  • parenting struggles
  • difficult co-workers
  • uncertainty about a medical issue
  • feeling lost spiritually
  • unmet expectations

And sometimes we have more than one of these happening at the same time!

So how do we praise God on those days…days when we feel overwhelmed, helpless, or hopeless? Here are five ideas.

Here are five ways we can continue to praise God when we're in a hard season of life.

1. Focus on God’s character.

What we face from one life season to another will change, but God never does. Get into His Word. Write down and meditate on Bible verses that tell you Who God is.

2. Recount His faithfulness in your life.

I think almost every post this month has included this point, but it’s so true. Think back to past trials, times when you hit a rough patch and God came through for you. Remind yourself that God has been steadfast and constant in His deliverance and provision.

3. Make a conscious decision to trust Him.

Now, when it’s hard, is the time to prove your faith. We can’t see behind the scenes to how He is working. We don’t know how or when our difficult circumstances will end. So just decide right there in the middle of it to have faith and trust God.

4. Be grateful.

As the hymn writer says, count your blessings. Are there days when the silver lining is so thin you can barely see it? You bet. But you’ll never see it if you’re not looking. Before you get out of bed each morning, mentally give thanks for something. Do like I do and keep a gratitude journal. Every day write down at least three things for which you’re thankful.

5. Reach out to others.

This one is two-pronged. First of all, ask someone you love and trust to pray for you or with you about what you’re facing. Pray for a proper perspective on the problem. If they’ve been through something similar, they can empathize. They can come alongside you and help you offer praise.

Secondly, see who there is around you who could use your help. Give someone else a reason to praise God because you’ve been a blessing to them!

When life is difficult, we can still worship our Lord and praise our God. I like how Habakkuk sums it up.

“Although the fig tree shall not blossom, neither shall fruit be in the vines; the labor of the olive shall fail, and the fields shall yield no meat; the flock shall be cut off from the fold, and there shall be no herd in the stalls: Yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will joy in the God of my salvation.” [3:17-18]

(In Friday’s subscriber e-mail I’ll be talking about a verse I’ve read many times that came to mean something new and personal to me in light of a recent disappointment. If you’re not already subscribed, you can do so here.)

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7 Important Prayers for Our Homes and Families

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This month on the blog we’ve been talking about our homes. Previous posts focused on how to keep traps out of our homes and discovering what makes our homes happy.

Today I want to talk about how we can pray for our homes and families, especially in our current culture. These seven ideas are based on Scripture. You could pray one of these prayers for your family each day of the week. Or you could choose one day to pray through all seven, making your home your prayer focus for that day.

I hope these remind all of us of the importance of praying for our homes and families. How thankful we can be for a God who hears and answers our prayers!

Here's a list of 7 Bible-based prayers that we can pray over our homes and families this year. You can use one for each day of the week!

Here’s a list of seven prayers to pray for our homes and families.

1. Pray that our homes will be built on a solid foundation of faith.

“Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock:And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock.” ~Matthew 7:24-25

Hard times will come to our families. Your storm will look different than mine and different than your neighbors. And when those rains and floods come, we want our homes to still be standing when it’s all over. That can only happen as we build our house on the rock of God’s Word and live by it.

Prayer: Dear God, help us to build our home on You and Your Word. Give us ears and hearts to hear what the Bible says to us and the strength to live out its commands. May we base our decisions on Bible principles, seeking your guidance through prayer. When trials come, may our family be a testimony to our faith in you.

2. Pray for the courage to make Godly choices in your home regardless of what culture says or the choices others around you make.

“And if it seem evil unto you to serve the Lord, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” ~Joshua 24:15

It seems like every day it becomes clearer that following God or following the world system and its philosophies are in direct opposition. While we’re to be good citizens in the world, we’re not to buy into beliefs that go against what God teaches us in His Word. In his day, Joshua made it clear where he and his family stood.

Prayer: God, give us the courage to make a stand as a family to do right. May we do it as a way to honor you, in a spirit of love and mercy for those who don’t know you, so we can be a light shining brightly in a world that is dark with sin.

3. Pray for our homes to be marked by love and unity.

“Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.” ~1 Corinthians 13:4-7

This one gets kind of personal! Sometimes it’s easier to love people outside our homes because we don’t know them and their faults nearly as well as we do the people who live inside our homes.

We know the characteristics of love from the passage above. It’s patient, kind, not jealous, selfless, not easily provoked, believes the best about the other person, longsuffering. Just reading through the list reminds me how often I fall short of loving my family well.

Yet our homes can be characterized by love, even though we’ll have children – and adults – who disagree. We can speak our love and we can show it through our actions.

Prayer: Lord, let love characterize our home. When children argue, when parents disagree, convict our hearts. Don’t let us get caught up in having to be right or only be concerned about getting our own way. May we cultivate a love within our family that flows over into the lives of others as a testimony to the love you have for each one of us.

4. Pray that God will protect your home from evil.

“But the Lord is faithful, who shall stablish you, and keep you from evil.” ~2 Thessalonians 3:3

We talked about some of the harmful things that can enter our homes in a post earlier this month. Blatant sin, like pornography, brings evil directly into our homes. But we also want to pray that God will keep our family from the subtle influences that may seem harmless at first but can lead to real problems.

Prayer: God, please protect our home from evil. Don’t let Satan gain a foothold in any of our lives. Help us to guard against temptation, especially in areas where we know we’re weak. We know that greater is He that is in us than he that is in the world. [1 John 4:4] May your Holy Spirit keep our hearts tender and sensitive to those things that would lead us into sin.

5. Pray for wisdom to build your home and guide your family.

“Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.” ~Proverbs 14:1

I definitely want to be the wise woman, not the foolish one! We can build up our homes by loving and encouraging those in our family, and by following Biblical principles.

According to James 1:5, wisdom is ours for the asking. I often face situations that I don’t know how to deal with. But God has the wisdom I need and He willingly makes it available to me.

Prayer: God, I need your wisdom to build my home in a way that’s pleasing to you. Help me remember to pray for that wisdom before I give correction or advice to my children. Your Word provides direction, so bring appropriate verses to my mind when I’m not sure what to do. Thank you that you’re always willing to give wisdom when I ask for it.

6. Pray that God will bless and protect each one in your family, that He will be gracious to them and give them peace.

“The Lord bless thee, and keep thee: the Lord make his face shine upon thee, and be gracious unto thee: The Lord lift up his countenance upon thee, and give thee peace.” ~Numbers 6:24-26

This is my favorite passage to pray over my husband and our girls. In fact, I have a print of these verses hanging on a wall in our living area.

Prayer: Lord, bless my daughter/son/spouse today. Protect her mind, her heart and her body. May your face shine on her. Please show her your grace as she goes through her day. Watch over her and give her your peace in her spirit.

7. Praise God for how He provides for and blesses our homes as we trust in Him.

“Charge them that are rich in this world, that they be not highminded, nor trust in uncertain riches, but in the living God, who giveth us richly all things to enjoy;” ~1 Timothy 6:17

What a blessing our families can be! It’s a privilege to grow together spiritually, to become friends with our adult children, to see our children learn lessons and mature, and to experience how we as parents become better people because we’ve learned from our children.

Prayer: Dear God, thank you for the gift of a home and a family. One day we’ll know the full experience of a family when we’re all in Heaven with you. Thank you that we can have a tiny taste of that here as we learn and grow with ones we love so much.

May we use the gift of prayer to intercede with our Heavenly Father on behalf of our homes and families so that together, we can bring glory to God.

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3 Places to Find God’s Goodness When Life is Hard

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As I write this post on a late January afternoon, it’s partly cloudy outside and temps are in the low 70s. Winter days here in coastal South Carolina can be unpredictable, but I’ll take this one for sure!

I know a lot of people who are carrying heavy loads in this first month of 2021. I mentioned that we’ve already been to two funerals, and have other friends who’ve lost loved ones. We know people who’ve had surgeries, hospitalizations, received a cancer diagnosis, or dealt with covid. None of us are exempt from trials.

In my Friday e-mail to blog subscribers, I included a video where I talked about part of our journey expecting an anencephalic baby. [If you’re not signed up to receive those e-mails, you can do that here.] Since we’ve been looking at God’s goodness on the blog this month, I hoped to encourage you by sharing a time in my life when God’s goodness was particularly evident.

Today I wanted to dig into this a little more. When we’re going through a difficult time, it may not be natural to immediately focus on God’s goodness. But if we can, it’s always there for us to see. It can change our perspective on the situation and give us hope going forward.

When life is hard, we can still see God's goodness in our lives in these three ways.

Three ways we see God’s goodness in our trials are through…

1. His grace

Like His unexplainable peace, God’s grace is always there to sustain us. It’s such a comfort to know that whatever comes, He will give us grace to meet the need.

In our case, it arrived when well-meaning strangers saw that I was pregnant and excitedly asked questions about the baby. They had no idea that she would never take a breath on her own on this earth.

We needed grace as other couples around us were choosing furniture for their nursery while we chose a gravesite. And His grace brought me through a difficult delivery and allowed us to hold our stillborn baby.

Does God’s grace mean that there weren’t hard days? Of course not. But His grace sustained us and brought us through that trial. We came to a place of knowing His goodness that we’d never have reached without it.

“But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after that ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, stablish, strengthen, settle you.” ~1 Peter 5:10

2. His gifts

Can there really be gifts in a trial? Yes, so many! Among the greatest were our ob/gyn who fully supported our decision to continue the pregnancy. Our labor and delivery nurse in the hospital was unbelievably kind and caring. Family, friends, and church members prayed for and supported us.

While we may not have seen it at the time, God used this trial to knit my husband and me together. We gained a common confidence in the goodness of God. What a gift that was! It’s a lesson that has stood us in good stead over the 23 years since this happened.

God’s gifts can be people or financial provision or deliverance from a situation that only He could have orchestrated. Regardless of the form it takes, there are always gifts from God that demonstrate His unfailing goodness.

“Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning.” ~James 1:17

3. His guidance

After our baby was born, I needed to go back to work. I’d given up my teaching job before we received our baby’s diagnosis since I thought I’d be staying home with a baby. God opened the door to a wonderful administrative position in a hospital system that was a blessing for the next three years. That experience would never have unfolded if not for the trial we’d been through.

In every difficulty we face, there are decisions to make. We won’t always know what to do. But as we pray and seek God through His Word, we can trust that He will guide us into what is best for us because He is good.

“The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and he delighteth in his way.” ~Psalm 37:23

Have you’ve experienced God’s goodness for yourself? I hope the verses we looked at in last week’s post cement in your soul the truth that He is a good God. Whether life is smooth or today is hard, let’s look for His goodness in His grace, His gifts, and His guidance.

[If you’d like to read our full story about our daughter Angel, I wrote a blog post series on it called Our Story of God’s Goodness and Grace.]

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How Can We Know God Will Be Good to Us in 2021?

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Here we are, partway through the first full week of 2021. I’m excited about the year ahead. Hopefully, we’re all still on track with our goals at this point!

However, I know that just because one year rolled into the next, none of our trials or troubles just automatically disappeared. We’re likely carrying over some fears or disappointments from last year. Perhaps we don’t see a lot of hope ahead, even with 2020 behind us. Maybe we’ve even questioned whether God will be good to us in the coming months.

I believe we can definitely say that He will!

Let’s start this discussion with how we define “good.” Here’s a parenting example that might help.

As a child (okay, so maybe this is still the case!), one of my daughters would have thought it was “good” to eat only dessert for every meal with a few candy snacks between those meals for good measure! But while that would have fulfilled her physical desire in the moment, it would in no way be good for her overall health. As her mom, I knew more than she did as a four-year-old. Hence, fruits and vegetables appeared on her plate more often than chocolate ice cream.

In the same way, what we deem as “good” for us isn’t always seen that way by a God who is much wiser than we are. He alone knows what is truly good for us. What He allows into our lives – some of which we may not see as good – is ultimately what is best for us. Those things will help us grow into the person that He would have us to be.

So how do we know we can trust God to be good to us in 2021? Here are three reasons.

Here are three reasons we can know that God will be good to us in the coming year.

His Word tells us so.

“Oh how great is thy goodness, which thou hast laid up for them that fear thee; which thou hast wrought for them that trust in thee before the sons of men!” ~Psalm 31:19

Isn’t it neat to think about God storing up goodness for us, His beloved children?! So many of those things will be received by us as blessings straight from His hand. It could be financial gain, good health, a steady job, the love of family, His clear guidance, and so many other things.

Over and over in the Bible, we’re told that God is good. Not only that, but we also read stories of His goodness to His people.

Think of the life of Joseph. God was good to him and blessed him throughout his life. Did being sold as a slave or unjustly imprisoned seem good? No, not in the moment. But look at how God used him to preserve the lives of his countrymen as well as his own family.

Remember what he told his brothers in Genesis 50:20? “But as for you, ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive.“

Here are a couple more verses that tell us God is good.

“The Lord is good to all: and his tender mercies are over all his works.” ~Psalm 145:9

“O give thanks unto the Lord; for he is good; for his mercy endureth forever.” ~1 Chronicles 16:34

God has been good to us in the past.

“O Lord, thou art my God; I will exalt thee, I will praise thy name; for thou hast done wonderful things; thy counsels of old are faithfulness and truth.” ~Isaiah 25:1

Every one of us has lived through hard times. Yet not one of us can say that God hasn’t been faithful.

This is one reason why I love keeping a gratitude journal. Even before I got as old as I am, my memory was short! I get into a trial and forget what God did previously in a similar situation. But when it’s written down, I can read back through how He worked in the past and trust that He’ll do the same in the present.

I like this quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson.

“All I have seen teaches me to trust the creator for all I have not seen.“

Here are a couple more verses that encourage us to recall God’s goodness.

“I will remember the works of the Lord: surely I will remember thy wonders of old. I will meditate also of all thy work, and talk of thy doings.” ~Psalm 77:11-12

“O taste and see that the Lord is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in him.” ~Psalm 34:8

God has a plan to prosper us.

“And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” ~Romans 8:28

I’ve sometimes avoided this verse because it feels overused. It’s like we trot it out to give people comfort when something “bad” comes into their lives. But it’s God’s Word, so it’s one hundred percent true.

ALL things work together for good in God’s economy. He only wants what’s best for us. In the long run, He wants us to flourish spiritually and in every other area of our lives.

Not a one of us could have foretold what 2020 would look like. But God knew. And in each individual case, He had a plan.

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.” ~Jeremiah 29:11

Will things that we deem “bad” continue to happen in 2021? I’d say that’s almost a guarantee. But from God’s perspective, all of it can be His blessing and through His grace, it works for our good and His glory.

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It’s a Storyline Through Time, Waiting on God

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Happy week before Christmas!!

December continues to fly by here. Our college daughter took her last final exam online this week. Today is the last day of school for our high school senior before her two-week holiday break.

In these days leading up to Christmas, I’ve been thinking a lot about what it means to wait. As we move through Advent, I remember Mary, mother of Jesus. How she must have waited eagerly for the birth of her promised son! Israel as a nation had been waiting hundreds of years for their Messiah to come. Individuals like Simeon and Anna in Luke 2 were waiting for the fulfillment of a promise God had made long ago.

If you’re like me, your 2020 has had some waiting seasons in it. Even now we wait to see what will happen with the COVID vaccine. We wonder how long it will be before we can ditch the masks, travel freely, and return to “life before COVID.”

Recently I’ve found myself in a particular situation of my own that I’d like to see resolved. But it’s going to require some waiting. As I continued my recent Bible study in Psalms, I came to this verse which reminded me to make God the focus of all my waiting.

“My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him.” ~Psalm 62:5

Waiting on God is worth it. Waiting on another person to deliver me or on some plan I’ve concocted to fix everything isn’t. It doesn’t take long for me to exhaust my own resources. My plans get derailed and none of my efforts to resolve things work out. Other people may try to help, but God is the only one who can truly provide what I need.

And doesn’t our faith grow stronger as we wait? If everything happened on our schedule, how would we learn to trust? Yet when we see God’s faithfulness time and time again on our behalf, we get a little bit bolder at claiming His promises while we patiently wait.

I’m looking forward to 2021, to starting a new year. But flipping a calendar won’t fix my problems. No, my hope is found in God. I can expect all that God has in store for me next year to be good for me because He is good.

If you’re waiting for something today – a relationship to be repaired, a situation to be resolved, wisdom and guidance for a big decision – turn your focus on God. Expect Him to answer your prayer, to deliver on His promises just as He did for Mary, for Israel, for Simeon, and for Anna.

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How to Keep On Going When Your Faith is Weak

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Last week we spent several days in the Tennessee mountains with my extended family. We stayed in some lovely facilities and had a wonderful time together.

It was definitely nice to get away and be out of our normal routine for a bit. Because lately, I’m finding myself with more questions than answers most days. It seems like we’ve been living in upheaval and uncertainty for such a long time, though I realize it’s actually only been about five months.

Some mornings it’s harder than others to get my mind moving in the right direction, to fully step into faith and not focus on all the “when’s, why’s, and what if’s.”

I’ll just say it out loud. Some days my faith is weak.

Faith is confidently believing what God has said. That sounds pretty easy on the surface.

I like what Matthew Henry says in his commentary on Hebrews 11:1. “It [faith] is a firm persuasion and expectation that God will perform all he has promised to us in Christ.“

On the good days, I know that, and I’m quoting Bible verses and looking up and moving ahead. But other days I’m questioning a bit, and my faith slips. And in case you have days like that, too, here’s some encouragement for all of us.

“For we walk by faith, not by sight.” ~2 Corinthians 5:7

There’s the goal. Walk by faith. But is that our reality? Are we living by what we know God has said or are we living by what we see around us?

I see fear and unrest, people and plans that can’t be counted on. Worry seems like a pretty good option. But we can’t make our circumstances the focus. Each day we have to ask God for faith to get through that day. And we have to lean hard into the promises we find in Scripture.

“Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith;” ~Hebrews 12:2

We would have not faith without Jesus. Our faith originates with Him. He’s also the completer of it in our lives, the one who perfects or matures our faith. I can’t grow it myself. I have to allow Him to cultivate it in me.

Christ is the ultimate example of faith for us to follow. Certainly He faced times of uncertainty in His earthy life – even to the cross – yet His faith was constant.

“So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.” ~Romans 10:17

We can expect weak faith if we’re not in our Bibles regularly. The news isn’t going to grow our faith. If we’re looking to Facebook or Netflix to strengthen it, we will continue to be weak. The only place to build up our faith is in God’s Word.

“Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience.” ~James 1:3

Maybe we could have skipped this verse. That whole “trying of your faith” thing doesn’t sound like something we want to sign up for!

Is your faith being tried? Mine is. Do I have faith that God is working all things together for our good? Or is this all just a mess that we have to muddle through?

Faith leads us to believe that He has a purpose in everything, even COVID-19. It’s not my plan. It’s His. Part of what comes with each trial, if we’ll allow it, will be increased patience

I like this particular dictionary definition of patience – “the capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without getting angry or upset.” I could use some of that!

“For whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world: and this is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith.” ~1 John 5:4

Our faith will lead us to be victorious. Are the times we’re living in unprecedented? In some ways, yes. But God is still on His throne. We know the end of the story. And faith in God will bring us through these days and even prepare us for whatever lies ahead.

“Nevertheless when the Son of man cometh, shall he find faith on the earth?” ~Luke 18:8

Let the answer to this question be yes!! With God’s help, may our faith be stronger today than it was yesterday. Let’s not give in, but press on in faith, especially as we see how faithful our God is to us.

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