Girls To Grow

Nurturing moms in their walk with God

10 Ways to Manage All the Hopes and Dreams We Have for Our Children

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Parenting is a marvelous thing. In the normal process of life, we start with a newborn baby who is totally dependent on us and end with a real, human adult who is fully capable of making decisions and providing for him/herself.

And by “marvelous,” I do mean wonderful and extraordinary, but I sure don’t mean easy. Full of joy, yes, but also pain. It’s a journey that drains us dry…with its happy and sad tears, abundant need for patience and wisdom, and lack of sleep (from babies to teens!)

I read this quote quite awhile ago, but I’ve been thinking about it more recently perhaps because our daughters are now on the precipice of living out their own hopes and dreams.

“Women who earnestly desire to be good mothers need to….commit everything to Him [God] first and foremost, including their hopes, dreams, and expectations, not only for themselves but also for their children.” ~From the book Mothering Heights by Keitha Smith and Susan Brereton

Well, that part right there about “commit everything to God” could be the beginning of my life struggles! It comes back to one of the overarching themes here on the blog, which is trusting God.

As new parents, we all want what we believe is best for our children. Yet life has a way of derailing or changing those plans. Maybe some of them are met and exceeded, while others fall by the wayside. Whatever season of parenting you’re in, here are ten ways we can deal with all those hopes and dreams we hold close to our hearts.

1. Trust God with your children’s future.

I love the following verse!

“He shall feed his flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the lambs with his arm, and carry them in his bosom, and shall gently lead those that are with young.” ~Isaiah 40:11

What can give me more peace than thinking about God gathering our young ones in His arms and carrying them close to His heart?!!

We know all these truths in our heads, but we must believe them in our hearts. God loves our children more than we do. He knows better than we do what is good and best for them.

2. Pray for your children to be sensitive to God’s leading for their lives.

This is a prayer I’ve been praying for one of our daughters this month. You see, I don’t have the power to convict anyone of sin or to grow them in their spiritual walk or to show them the best plan for their life.

However, the Holy Spirit does. But if she’s not in tune with Him, she’s not likely to hear and obey.

3. Ask God to give you wisdom if/when they come to you for advice.

We need wisdom so we don’t push our own agenda on our children, but truly help them see how God might be leading and working in their lives. Pointing them to the truths of God’s Word can help them discern the best decision to make.

4. Let them live their own dreams, not yours.

We probably all know parents who are living their lives through their children.  All that they wanted to do or be, they pin on their children. Let’s allow our children to have and follow their own dreams.

5. Age-appropriately, allow them to decide what activities and passions they will pursue.

We do have to keep a balance if we have a child who wants to do all the things! But if they express an interest in a particular subject or activity, try to find a way to accommodate them. That could be anything from getting them books or watching a video about the subject to kicking a soccer ball with them in the backyard. One of my dad’s special gifts was showing an interest in anything one of his children was interested in.

6. Keep an eternal perspective.

More important than any sports accomplishment or music award or academic recognition is that our children learn to walk with God. I know that it’s not always easy when our schedules are busy, but making spiritual things a priority is vital.

7. Encourage them when things aren’t going the way they had planned.

Whether at 7 or 17 or 27, our children will experience unfulfilled hopes or expectations. Disappointments are a part of life, and we can be a huge help as our children learn to handle them. We can come alongside with empathy, and then encourage them in their next step.

8. Allow them to suffer consequences for poor decisions.

There are times we may need to step in and help…but not always. Sometimes great lessons are learned by natural consequences. They may have to re-do the homework or be late to practice or pay for the repairs, but those consequences can develop maturity.

9. Ask God to give you peace.

“Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee.” ~Isaiah 26:3

We can’t focus on what we can do to solve a situation. Rather, we have to rest in who God is and what He can do with our children. It’s a constant battle of taking the worry and control back on our selves, then turning it back over to Him with every new situation and life change.

10. If (more likely when) your child disappoints you, take it to God and continue to show love to your child.

I think at some point we’ll likely all disagree with a choice that our child makes. It may be something big or something small, but I doubt that every expectation we had when we started this parenting gig will be fulfilled.

But what I’m learning is that God uses the parenting process to refine me as much as He does my children. And their failures can draw me to God in prayer for them as I continue to show His love to them.

The older our daughters get the more opportunities there are for God to lead them in a certain direction. My part, first and foremost, is to pray for them. Then, as I’m able, I can share any wisdom I may have gained, being careful to allow God to work in their hearts and not imposing my desires upon them. God has a wonderful plan for their lives, and it’s exciting to think about how He might use them for His glory!

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5 Principles from Proverbs to Guide Communication in Our Relationships

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Do you like to talk? I tend to think of myself as a fairly quiet person, but my husband may feel otherwise! 🙂

Regardless, most of us use a bunch of words every day. Those who are closest to us often get the benefit (or detriment!) of many of them.

This came to mind on Monday as I was reading Proverbs 10. I’ve read it often, but this time I noticed how many verses in this one chapter deal with our speech. I figured this topic must be important if it got this much attention!

Whether it’s in marriage, parenting, or friendships, our words have power. I found a few principles in the verses below that can be helpful to us. I’ve not mastered these guidelines that I’m sharing, but I definitely want to do a better job at them!

1. Make sure that our words are refreshing and lifegiving.

Verse 11: The mouth of a righteous man is a well of life: but violence covereth the mouth of the wicked.

We want people to feel better – not worse – after talking to us! I’m reminded of Proverbs 18:21 which tells us that death and life are in the power of the tongue. The words we speak should energize and invigorate people. If someone comes to us down and discouraged, what we say can give them new energy and strength.

The opposite of this could be criticism or using words that wound. Sometimes if we’ve been offended, it’s natural to try to hurt the other person with our words. Or maybe we get frustrated with their behavior and are critical of our husband or one of our children. If we want to be that righteous man, we must choose to either keep quiet or speak kindly.

After a discouraging day at work, our husbands need us to use our words to build them back up. When our teenager’s missed out on an opportunity she really wanted to pursue or had a friendship breakup, she needs our words of support. She may not always act that way – and may even use her words to drive us away – but she needs us to continue to pursue and encourage her.

2. Speak words of wisdom.

Verse 13: In the lips of him that hath understanding wisdom is found: but a rod is for the back of him that is void of understanding.

Speech that is discreet and prudent shows that we are wise. Here we need the Holy Spirit’s help so we can discern what to say at times. We want to be careful not to purposely offend with our speech, but to be tactful and considerate.

Verse 31 also fits in here. The mouth of the just bringeth forth wisdom: but the froward tongue shall be cut out.

Just like the fruit tree brings forth fruit, so we can produce wise words as we learn to be “just” and walk with Christ. I’m also reminded of the Proverbs 31 woman who is described as opening her mouth with wisdom and having the law of kindness in her tongue. I would love to be described that way!!

3. Don’t talk negatively about other people.

Verse 18: He that hideth hatred with lying lips, and he that uttereth a slander, is a fool.

At times I struggle with all of these, but this one may be the most difficult to abide by. When we find someone else who shares our less-than-favorable opinion about another person, it’s easy to just dissolve into tearing that person down. Maybe it’s all true…but it takes us back to that old saying, “Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary?”

Even more seriously, we don’t want to be guilty of passing on rumors or sharing false, damaging information about others. Let’s stop the gossip train before it gets started!

4. Recognize the value of silence.

Verse 19: In the multitude of words there wanteth not sin: but he that refraineth his lips is wise.

I was talking to another mom recently about a situation involving our kids that we were frustrated with. I think both of us felt like we should march up to the authority involved and address them about it. But then my friend saved the situation by saying, “I’ve never regretted what I didn’t say in these moments.” She was absolutely right. That advice can keep me from speaking hastily or harshly and later being sorry that I reacted that way.

Let’s listen more than we talk. Remember Proverbs 17:18? Even a fool is considered wise when he keeps quiet.

5. Choose words that are appropriate and applicable to the current situation.

Verse 20: The tongue of the just is as choice silver: the heart of the wicked is little worth.

We’ve likely all been in situations where someone said just the right thing at just the right time and was a blessing to us. We may have also encountered people who ramble on and on (maybe about themselves) and what they said was of no benefit to anyone.

Verse 32 touches on this as well. The lips of the righteous know what is acceptable: but the mouth of the wicked speaketh frowardness.

It’s important, too, to leave the past in the past when dealing with our families. Don’t bring up that old argument with your husband or remind your child about how they failed the last time. Let’s stick to the present and speak in a way that helps us all move forward together.

Our words can be truth-centered, grace-filled, and honoring to the Lord as we seek His help to follow these principles.

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5 Areas in Which We Need to Seek a Perceiving Heart

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There’s a lot on the internet about the word/term perception. As I looked around, I came across the familiar abbreviation “ESP.” That’s extrasensory perception, otherwise known as a gut feeling or a sixth sense. We might experience that sensation at some point, but I’ll leave that for someone more scientifically minded to delve into!

The type of perception I want to talk about comes from a passage in the Old Testament. In Deuteronomy 29, Moses talks to the Israelites about the miracles God has performed prior to their leaving Egypt as well as during their travels through the wilderness.

In verse 4, Moses says this to the Israelites. “Yet the LORD hath not given you an heart to perceive, and eyes to see, and ears to hear, unto this day.”

As I thought about that it struck me as a great tragedy that we would lack the ability to be aware of what’s really happening around us. Maybe we could even physically see it with our eyes or hear it with our ears, but wouldn’t be able to understand what is actually going on.

I know I want a heart that perceives, one that is spiritually conscious, emotionally sensitive, and realizes what needs to be done. Unlike the Israelites, I want to recognize when God is working and moving in the circumstances of life.

While perception is important in many areas, here are five for us to focus on.

We need perception in order to…

…notice the continual blessings of God.

Last week I had a medical test scheduled that I was anxious to have done. I showed up for the appointment – early even! – and was told that I was supposed to be at a different office location across town. The office personnel were very helpful and said they would try to fit me in there. Within just a few minutes, I was told that there had been a cancellation. I was able to go right in at my scheduled time and have the test done. One of the nurses said it was my lucky day, but I knew it wasn’t luck!

Every day the blessings of God surround us. But, if you’re like me, you can get so busy that you don’t notice them. May God give us the ability to perceive those blessings and give Him praise for them.

…encourage the hearts of our husband and children.

I specifically remember a couple of nights when I’ve gone to bed and then sensed that I needed to get up and go check on one of my girls. (Those teenagers stay up a lot later than I do!) It’s not easy because I crave my sleep! Yet I’ve come to believe that it’s usually the Holy Spirit prompting me to connect with them. In those specific instances, it truly was a moment that they needed to have conversations with me that were much more important than the missed sleep!

Often, if we’re paying attention, we can sense that something is wrong with our husband or children. I’m sure I’ve missed some opportunities in the past. But we can pray that God will give us hearts to perceive what our family members need so we can come alongside and uplift them.

…root out sinful habits in our own lives.

Psalm 66:18 says that if I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord won’t hear me. If we indulge in known sin and aren’t willing to repent, our prayer life is affected.

We need to deal with sin swiftly. This requires humility on our part, a willingness to admit that we fail God and do our own thing often. Job says, “How many are mine iniquities and sins? make me to know my transgression and my sin.” [13:23] We need a heart like that so we can perceive our sin and seek forgiveness.

…minister to the needs of others around us.

This one hits close to home. I’m often too self-focused to perceive the needs of others. Philippians 2:4 reminds us to care about what’s going on in people’s lives. If we have a heart that can perceive those needs, then God can use us to meet them.

…recognize truth.

There are many false teachers today, and likely there always have been. Sometimes it’s easy to be swayed by the arguments of men. Yet how vital it is that we base everything we believe on the Word of God. Listening to what “tickles our ears” may make us feel good, but if it’s not truth, we can easily be led astray. We need to ground ourselves in Scripture and ask the Holy Spirit to give us insight that will keep us on the right path.

May God graciously give us hearts to perceive in these five areas – and even more – as we seek to live in a way that honors Him.

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10 Bible Verses to Pray When Your Teenager Needs Direction

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Late last fall, our daughter called from college with a couple of job options for this coming summer. Both were good opportunities – totally different, but each with its own potential for personal growth as well as benefits for the future.

She had about a month to make her decision. She wanted to pray about it, and also gather more information so she could make an informed choice.

There was really no right or wrong answer. She determined which one she thought would be best for her and we’ll see how it plays out this summer. Regardless, she definitely seems at peace with her decision.

These late teen years bring a lot of decisions. Where to go to college, what career field to study, what job or internship to take for the summer, is this a person I should date – all of those and more face our children during this season.

I recently read Jodie Berndt’s book Praying the Scriptures for Your Adult Children: Trusting God with the Ones You Love. (It’s hard to believe, but I technically already have an adult child, so I’m trying to get on top of things!) The book reminded me of how much I enjoy praying God’s Word over my children.

Since then, I’ve found the verses below that encompass getting God’s direction and guidance. I’m going to keep this list handy to pray for both of my girls. And by the way, you can modify these and use them to pray for direction in areas of your own life, too!

1. Help her to trust in you with all her heart. Don’t let her lean on her own understanding. May she acknowledge you in all her ways, and fully trust in you to direct her paths. [Proverbs 3:5-6]

2. Let her ears hear a word behind her saying ‘This is the way. Walk in it’ when she turns to the right or the left. [Isaiah 30:21]

3. Instruct her and teach her in the way she should go. Guide her with your eye. [Psalm 32:8]

4. As she devises plans for her life, please direct her steps. [Proverbs 16:9]

5. Lord, guide her continually. Satisfy her soul and strengthen her in hard times. Help her to flourish. [Isaiah 58:11]

6. Help her to seek wise, Godly counselors as she makes decisions for her life. [Proverbs 11:14]

7. Order her steps so that you will delight in her way and she will find joy in the journey. When she falls (and she will), uphold her with your hand. [Psalm 37:23]

8. Show her your ways, Lord, and teach her your paths. Lead her in your truth, for you are the God of her salvation. Help her to wait on you. [Psalm 25:4-5]

9. May your word be a lamp to her feet and a light to her path. [Psalm 119:105]

10. God, please equip her for all that you would have her to do in your will. By your grace, work in her life that which is well-pleasing in your sight so that she might always bring glory to you. [Hebrews 13:21]

I’ve prayed for many years that our daughters would make good decisions and wise choices. It’s a comfort to me to pray these verses and seek God’s help for them to do just that!

*This post contains Amazon affiliate links. If you click on a product link and make a purchase, I receive a small percentage from the sale at no extra cost to you. Thank you for supporting Girls to Grow through your purchases!

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Grace for The Gaps in Our Parenting

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With our daughters now 19 and 17, I’m nearing the end of my active parenting years. While I’ll always be a mom to our girls, very soon I won’t be speaking directly into their lives on a daily basis. (With our 19-year-old at college out-of-state, our younger daughter gets all the benefit of my attention now, for which I’m sure she’s grateful…ha ha!)

As I look back over the past years, I see some areas where I think I’ve done okay. I’ve done none of it perfectly for sure. Yet I’m pleased that I passed along a love of reading books. Both girls make their beds most mornings. They can drive a car and balance a checkbook and clean a bathroom.

But what about the more important things? Have I challenged them enough to develop their character? Have I emphasized spiritual values and modeled disciplines that will affect their success in the future? I’m sure those things haven’t always gotten the time and attention that they deserved.

I’ve missed some opportunities. Teachable moments have drifted away without me claiming them. I was too busy doing the daily stuff of life – or just caught up in my own world – to focus on them.

So when I sit and worry about how I’ve messed up as a mom and feel badly about all the parenting opportunities I missed, I cling to this truth.

God’s grace will fill in the gaps.

I’ve made mistakes and failed as a mom many times over. But, to the best of our knowledge, both of our daughters have accepted Jesus as their Savior. Therefore, the same Holy Spirit that lives in and works on me does the same for them. They have God’s Word to lead and guide them well beyond anything I’ve tried to teach them.

And this verse gives me a lot of comfort.

“Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:” ~Philippians 1:6

You see, these children aren’t mine anyway. God simply gave them to my husband and me to steward for Him. Certainly, I’m accountable to do my best with that responsibility. But our children are a work in progress. And they are God’s work.

While He has graciously allowed me to parent them, ultimately He is in control of accomplishing His purpose in their lives. Whatever lessons we failed to teach or principles we didn’t fully convey, God will continue to work in their lives. My prayer for my girls’ future can be that God will fulfill His Word and perform His work in and through them.

On the flip side, if I’m tempted to take credit when I see our daughters make a right choice, I must stop and remind myself that the successes, too, are only possible because of God’s grace. It’s not my fabulous mothering skills that finally paid off. No, rather it’s a reminder that God can work in spite of my failings.

So if you’re discouraged about any parenting failures today, take heart. Our God is gracious. He loves our children more than we do. And He can and will work in their hearts to make them exactly what they need to be.

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A Life Well-Lived

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My dad passed away on Monday, January 6, 2020.

It obviously wasn’t the way any of us planned to start the year, but it was all in God’s timing. My father was saved as a young adult, and we are fully confident that he went straight from here into the presence of God. Never is heaven more real than when someone we love dearly now resides there!

Our family was overwhelmed by the love and support shown by the many who knew and loved him. As the pastor of a church for 46 years, he certainly influenced a large number of people. But even more deeply than that, it was the impact he had as a person. He treated everyone he interacted with as though they were the most important person in the world.

Not only in life but now in his passing, my dad was a testimony and a motivation to me to live this one life well. There are many ways in which I want to be like him, but here are three that came to mind. Hopefully, they can be a reminder to all of us to use the time we’ve been given with purpose and intention.

1. Continually seek wisdom.

I loved the verse my brother used at the funeral service.

“And God gave Solomon wisdom and understanding exceeding much, and largeness of heart, even as the sand that is on the sea shore.” ~1 Kings 4:29

Dad was wise because he spent substantial amounts of time in God’s Word. He was a humble man who knew he needed God’s help if he was going to be successful as a husband, father, and pastor.

I and many others benefited from that wisdom. Especially when it came to parenting issues, I was quick to ask how he might handle a certain situation. And the same wisdom that was available to him is there for us as we seek it in the Bible and pray for God’s guidance.

2. Be compassionate.

In the verse above, it says Solomon had “largeness of heart.” That would definitely describe my dad! He was always concerned about others and what they might be going through and wanted to help if he could.

My tendency is to be focused on myself. I need eyes to notice the needs of people around me and then respond quickly. The Holy Spirit can help me to “Bear…one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.” [Galatians 6:2]

3. Live for eternity.

I have no doubt that my dad heard “Well done, thou good and faithful servant!” He cared more about pleasing God than anyone else.

This week I was convicted as I read Mark 8:33 which talks about savoring the things of men more than the things of God. Perhaps we all have a tendency to focus on the here and now rather than viewing our thoughts, words, and actions from an eternal perspective. We’ll never regret time we spend in prayer, God’s Word, and reaching out to others.

There were hundreds of people at the visitation and funeral service last week to honor his memory. But they came because of what he did – which was care about people in order to introduce them to his Jesus whom he loved so much.

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3 Ways to Make a Difference in 2020

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I love a new year.

It’s a fresh slate, a clean start.

And fittingly, it comes at the end of the previous year, which is a natural time to reflect.

So did you take any time to look back over 2019? Did you look ahead at what you want to accomplish in 2020?

As I did both of those things, I decided that I want to be able to look back at the end of the next twelve months and see that I’ve made a difference. Honestly, I don’t know exactly what that looks like. But, alongside the other affirmation I’m writing down every morning, I’m writing this.

I am going to make a difference in 2020.

Do you want to make a difference this year? As I’ve begun digging deeper into how I can achieve this rather nebulous goal, I came up with three actions I can take that will definitely get me moving in the right direction. These are things we can all do this year!

1. Pray.

This seems so basic, but if we want to make a difference, it starts here. If we try to make a difference in our own strength or by doing things our own way, it’s not going to be profitable or lasting.

Instead, we can ask what need does God have for us to meet? Which people do we know who are craving a word of encouragement?

The answer might be obvious…but just as likely, it’s not. Yet if we’re in a habit of praying for those opportunities and asking God to guide us, He can show us exactly how and where we can make a difference.

James 5:16 says “The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.“

While praying might sound easy enough, it can sometimes be difficult. Prayer is definitely a discipline! But we can see blessings in our own lives and others’ lives if we make prayer a priority.

Our part is to pray. Then we trust God to actually do the work. We may not even know in this life how our prayers affected a situation.

2. Give.

Hearing this word usually brings money to mind. And that can certainly be part of it. But what difference could we make if we gave our time? How about giving our best effort to what needs doing? Maybe it’s just a hot casserole delivered to a front door or a few hours of free babysitting.

I love me some comfort and some quiet. Yet giving can require self-sacrifice and inserting myself into places that I might not always choose for myself.

Galatians 5:13 says, “For, brethren, ye have been called unto liberty; only use not liberty for an occasion to the flesh, but by love serve one another.“

Give a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on. Give up time that we wanted to spend on ourselves to serve someone else.

3. Submit.

Well, if we thought this process was going to be easy, this third one will remind us that it’s not. Are we really willing to submit our plans, our desires, and our will to God? Bottom line – that means we have to trust Him.

We can’t submit to what God wants and continue on with our own separate plan at the same time. We have to believe that wherever He leads and whatever He allows is for our good and His glory.

And no other person can make us submit. We are the only ones who have control over our will. Ouch! That means we also can’t blame anyone else if we fail to submit. No excuses.

James 4:6-7 says, “But he giveth more grace. Wherefore he saith, God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble. Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.“

We overcome our pride as we submit. We also become recipients of God’s grace in our humility.

I don’t want things to be the same at the end of 2020. Someone’s life could be better because I’ve interacted with them. A certain situation could have a positive outcome because I was involved. I hope you want that, too!

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Merry Christmas 2019

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So there’s no official family Christmas portrait this year, but we did get a quick photo of the four of us when we attended a performance of The Lion King a couple of weeks ago.

As we celebrate our Savior’s birth today, may our hearts be filled with the hope that His coming brings to each one of us.

“For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.

Of the increase of his government and peace there shall be no end, upon the throne of David, and upon his kingdom, to order it, and to establish it with judgment and with justice from henceforth even for ever. The zeal of the Lord of hosts will perform this.” ~Isaiah 9:6-7

Wishing you and your family a very merry Christmas!!

For the Woman Who Feels Like She’s Never Enough

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Often our inadequacies stare us right in the face.

Wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, employee, church member…the list is long. We have many roles to fill, many things we’re expected to do, to schedule, to handle.

And no matter how well we keep all the balls up in the air, at some point, one’s going to drop. And we can so easily get down on ourselves because we’ve failed again.

If you’re like me, you might jump to the assumption that I’m not loved because I’ve messed up.

Yes, I tell myself, I have to perform in order to be worthy of love. It’s important that I get it all right.

But that’s now how it works, at least not in God’s economy.

Because God loves us whether or not we spent thirty minutes reading our Bible this morning. His love isn’t based on our not missing a church service for the past three years. And He loves us even when we worry first and trust Him second.

Because if God’s love was based on our performance, it wouldn’t be love.

Does God want us to read our Bibles and go to church and totally trust Him? Yes, because He knows it will help us grow in our faith and ultimately be a better, Spirit-filled person.

But He loves us whether or not we do those things.

I had a conversation about this with my husband recently. Since our talk, I’ve written the following in my journal each morning.

I am loved because God loves me.

End of sentence. No if’s, and’s, or but’s.

What did I do to deserve that love? Nothing. What can I do that will cause Him to love me more? Nothing. What will make Him love me less? Nothing.

“Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.” ~1 John 4:10

“But God, who is rich in mercy, for his great love wherewith he loved us, Even when we were dead in sins, hath quickened us together with Christ, (by grace ye are saved;)” ~Ephesians 2:4-5

I’m not enough. You’re not enough. The woman at church with the perfect hair and adoring husband and obedient children – she’s not enough, either.

No matter how many good deeds we do or how often we pray or the sum of money we give, we will never be enough.

But we don’t have to be enough to be loved by God.

I just am. You just are.

Loved by God.

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7 Gifts I’d Like to Open That Won’t Be Under My Christmas Tree This Year

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Around this time of year, my husband and daughters ask me for a list of things I want for Christmas. I often have a hard time coming up with ideas for them!

However, in the weird way that my mind works sometimes, I started thinking about what it’d be like to create a list of spiritual “gifts” I’d like to receive. I came up with a list of those fairly quickly! Maybe it’s because I see many areas in my walk with Christ that need to improve.

No, these won’t be under my tree this year. But they’re available to all of us if we’re willing to submit ourselves to the teaching of God’s Word and His Holy Spirit.

So if spiritual things could be boxed up, here’s what I’d want to unwrap on Christmas morning.

1. An awareness of Jesus’ presence in my life every single day.

How often do we start our day with Him, then trudge through the remaining hours in our own strength and understanding. Or maybe that’s just me!

“The Lord thy God in the midst of thee is mighty; he will save, he will rejoice over thee with joy; he will rest in his love, he will joy over thee with singing.” Zephaniah 3:17

I’d like to live every day in the realization that Jesus is with me, and that God the Father is watching over and guiding me through every circumstance.

2. More trust and less worry.

I feel like I have grown in this area, but there’s definitely room for improvement! Do you tend to worry first, then move to trust? That’s my default mode, but I want trust to be my first response.

“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.” ~Proverbs 3:5-6

“All worrying makes you King and God incompetent.” ~Ann Voskamp

3. Wisdom

This gift is priceless. We need it every day – in our marriage, our parenting, and other relationships. We need it for guidance in decision making. Wisdom is an incredibly valuable gift, and we’re told how to get it. It comes as we fear the Lord and ask Him for it.

“The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the holy is understanding.” ~Proverbs 9:10

“If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.” ~James 1:5

4. A heart full of worship.

Our God deserves our praise. This is a season when we sing about worshipping and adoring Him, but let’s make it a reality in our lives throughout the year. More than just words from our lips, our worship can flow from our souls as we bow our hearts before Him.

“Sing unto the Lord, all the earth; shew forth from day to day his salvation. Declare his glory among the heathen; his marvellous works among all nations. For great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised: he also is to be feared above all gods.” ~1 Chronicles 16:23-25

5. A readiness to fight temptation with Scripture.

Having a Bible verse at the ready when we’re tempted to __________ [gossip/lose our temper/complain/allow bitterness in] will help us get victory over sin. That means we have to memorize verses that apply to whatever temptation we find ourselves facing. God’s Word has power over sin!

“Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee.” ~Psalm 119:11

6. Freedom from negative thoughts.

I don’t know about you, but I can so easily slip into a mental rant about a particular person or situation that I don’t feel is right. It would be much better to put my energy into praying about it and free up my mind for better things!

“Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.” ~Philippians 4:8

7. Eyes to see the needs of others.

Often this is just a case of us needing to slow down and notice. We can also ask God to open our eyes to ways we can help anyone He brings across our path. Whether it’s sharing the gospel with a person who’s lost or easing a financial burden, the first step is to see the need.

“Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.” ~Galatians 6:2

Is there another spiritual gift you find yourself in need of this Christmas season? How thankful we can be that the baby Jesus we’re celebrating provided a way for us to become the children of God and have access to all that He provides!

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