Girls To Grow - Nurturing moms in their walk with God

Pinpointing Blessings and Finding Encouragement

July 24, 2017 by Tracey Leave a Comment

So this isn’t going to be a “normal” post, but just an update on why I’ve been absent from the blog lately.

First of all, it’s summer. Our schedule’s been different every week, and it’s been hard to get into a writing routine.

Secondly, my dad’s had some health issues, so I took a trip up to Virginia last week.

I don’t think I’ve ever been away for several days while my husband and daughters were still at home. In spite of the difficult circumstances that caused me to leave town, I was so thankful for the following:

~ a new realization that my siblings are some of my favorite people on the planet

~ two teenage daughters who managed the house while I was gone

~ two sweet friends who delivered the girls where they needed to be (and entertained them as well)

~ a husband who told me to take as long as I needed to help my family

I’ve certainly been looking for encouragement in this season, and, as always, God’s Word and good music have been a blessing to my heart.

After praying through much of the night, and feeling like my prayers weren’t being answered, I read Psalm 65:2. Here David addresses God as “O Thou that hearest prayer…” What a reminder that God is hearing, and will answer in His time and His way.

When I looked at the circumstances and thought, “Lord, it’s hard to trust you now,” I found Psalm 62:8 that says “Trust in Him at all times…”

When I said “Yes, Lord, but this is really hard,” I remembered Job 13:15, which says “Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him…”

And a comforting hymn to remind me of God’s care…

Be not dismayed whate’er betide,
God will take care of you;
Beneath His wings of love abide,
God will take care of you.

Refrain:
God will take care of you,
Through every day, o’er all the way;
He will take care of you,
God will take care of you.

No matter what may be the test,
God will take care of you;
Lean, weary one, upon His breast,
God will take care of you.

~Civilla D. Martin

I know I’ve shared the video below on the blog before, but it’s been a fresh blessing to me in these days. When it seems like God isn’t at work, I have to trust that He is, and keep taking my burdens and needs to Him in prayer.

[If you’re reading in e-mail, you’ll have to click over to the blog to see the video.}

We have Vacation Bible School at our church this week. I’m looking forward to working with the 3rd and 4th graders each night!

Hoping to be back to a more regular blogging schedule soon. In the meantime, I hope your summer is going well!!

A Prayer for When You’re Feeling Overwhelmed

July 12, 2017 by Tracey 3 Comments

We all have those times in our lives when we feel utterly undone. Every day just seems to bring a new burden. Or perhaps negative emotions threaten to bury us. It could be grief, sickness, a jam-packed schedule, disappointment, or fear.

When that happens, I know where I need to go. It may not be what I feel like doing in the moment. But I’m writing this down here in hopes that I’ll look back and find encouragement in these words when I’m struggling through one of those seasons.

Comforting words based on Psalm 61

I’ve based this prayer on what I read from David in Psalm 61.

O, God, hear this prayer of mine.

I’m in a place I’ve never been before, and I’m overwhelmed. I can’t see my way out. Lead me to the rock that is higher than I. Set me in Christ, my Savior.

You’ve been my shelter in the past; shield me once again. I know I can find refuge in you. Help me trust You, lean on you when my strength is all gone. Let me have full confidence in your protection.

Measure out your mercy to me; I need it so much. Allow the truth of your Word to flood my mind and keep me safe from all the fears that want to take me down.

At the end of it all, dear Lord, let me praise your name. Have this situation bring you honor and glory. May I live every day, no matter how difficult, with a song of praise on my lips.

On the day that I was studying this chapter, I also read this hymn. I thought they fit well together!

Is there a heart o’erbound by sorrow?
Is there a life weighed down by care?
Come to the cross, each burden bearing;
All your anxiety—leave it there.

Refrain:
All your anxiety, all your care,
Bring to the mercy seat, leave it there,
Never a burden He cannot bear,
Never a friend like Jesus!

No other friend so swift to help you,
No other friend so quick to hear,
No other place to leave your burden,
No other one to hear your prayer.

Come then at once; delay no longer!
Heed His entreaty kind and sweet,
You need not fear a disappointment;
You shall find peace at the mercy seat.

~Edward H. Joy, 1920

Saturday Salutes

July 8, 2017 by Tracey 2 Comments

One of the beautiful old houses my husband and I saw on a day trip to Beaufort, SC last week.

Rebekah shares 3 Biblical Topics Young Women Must Study. These would be great for my girls as well as for myself – or as a study for us to do together!

Kristen writes Dear Daughter: God Uses Everything.

Deb has 12 Simple Ways to Worship God Every Day.

Joy lists 32 Simple Summer Activities for Kids.

Stephanie says Don’t “Yuck” on Someone Else’s “Yum.”

Like with a lot of other things, I’d gotten behind on listening to podcasts this summer. However, the Focus on the Family broadcast Words of Kindness, Source of Healing with Florence Littauer really spoke to me about the importance of using encouraging words to uplift others (especially my husband and children).

Our girls have been out of school for five weeks now, but I still feel like we’re just getting into a bit of a summer routine. Every week looks a little different, so I’m trying to just go with the flow – not my strong suit, but I’ll keep working on it! We got their class schedules for the upcoming school year in the mail this week, and now I’m even more determined to enjoy the slower pace before Chemistry and Algebra II make an appearance in our world!

Have a wonderful weekend!!

10 Bible Passages of Praise for Worshiping God

July 7, 2017 by Tracey 10 Comments

How often do you take time to just praise the Lord? I find when I ask myself that question that the answer is “Not enough.”

Yes, I add to my written “gratitude list” regularly. I try to remember to thank God when I see a prayer answered in my life. But sometimes I find that I’m still in the spotlight at those times – whereas if I’m praising God, then all the focus is on Him.

Praising God can take the form of music, which is uplifting and ministers to my soul. Meditating on words from the Bible that give praise to God also encourages my heart.

Here I’ve gathered ten passages that are centered on praise. I didn’t type out the entire passage, but included a verse(s) that I particularly like. Many of the selections below contain praise to God for the works He has done as well as praise for His attributes, Who He is. I hope to keep that same twofold focus as I offer my own praise to God.

Meditate on one of these ten Scripture passages as you seek to praise God.

1. Exodus 15:1-19 Here Moses recounts God’s victory over the Egyptians at the Red Sea.

The Lord is my strength and song, and he is become my salvation: he is my God, and I will prepare him an habitation; my father’s God, and I will exalt him. [verse 2]

2. I Samuel 2:1-10 Hannah praises God after the birth of her son Samuel.

There is none holy as the Lord: for there is none beside thee: neither is there any rock like our God. [verse 2]

3. II Samuel 22 David is the author of so many praise passages! Could his emphasis on praise be one of the reasons David was called a man after God’s own heart? (I Samuel 13:14, Acts 13:22) Here he is praising God for delivering him from his enemies, including King Saul.

As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the Lord is tried: he is a buckler to all them that trust in him. For who is God, save the Lord? and who is a rock, save our God? God is my strength and power: and he maketh my way perfect. He maketh my feet like hinds’ feet: and setteth me upon my high places. [verses 31-34]

4. I Chronicles 16:7-36 Celebrate with David as the ark of the covenant returns to Jerusalem.

Sing unto the Lord, all the earth; shew forth from day to day his salvation. Declare his glory among the heathen; his marvellous works among all nations. For great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised: he also is to be feared above all gods. [verses 23-25]

5. I Chronicles 29:10-20 David speaks to the people about his son Solomon becoming king, and the temple he will build for God.

Thine, O Lord is the greatness, and the power, and the glory, and the victory, and the majesty: for all that is in the heaven and in the earth is thine; thine is the kingdom, O Lord, and thou art exalted as head above all. Both riches and honour come of thee, and thou reignest over all; and in thine hand is power and might; and in thine hand it is to make great, and to give strength unto all. Now therefore, our God, we thank thee, and praise thy glorious name. [verses 11-13]

6. Psalm 103 I love that the Hebrew word for “Psalms” is “Praises.” Here’s a psalm of David.

Bless the Lord, O my soul: and all that is within me, bless his holy name. Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits: [verses 1-2]

7. Psalm 145 At one point, I wrote a post about this being my favorite praise passage.

I will extol thee, my God, O king; and I will bless thy name for ever and ever. Every day will I bless thee; and I will praise thy name for ever and ever. Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised; and his greatness is unsearchable. [verses 1-3]

8. Isaiah 25:1-9 And when it comes to favorites, Isaiah’s the prophet I most like to read.

O Lord, thou art my God; I will exalt thee, I will praise thy name; for thou hast done wonderful things; thy counsels of old are faithfulness and truth. [verse 1]

9. Luke 1:46-55 Mary’s Magnificat, or hymn of praise

And Mary said, My soul doth magnify the Lord, And my spirit hath rejoiced in God my Saviour. [verses 46-47]

10. Revelation 5:8-14 This scene is set in heaven. Yet another reason to spend time praising God here, to get ready for doing it in eternity!

Saying with a loud voice, Worthy is the Lamb that was slain to receive power, and riches, and wisdom, and strength, and honour, and glory, and blessing. [verse 12]

Are there are other Bible passages that you use to praise God? I’d also like to gather a list of hymns that praise God, so let me know if you have a favorite one of those as well!

Make Decisions with Your “Future” Eyes, Not Your “Now” Eyes

June 30, 2017 by Tracey 2 Comments

You know the old expression about getting the cart before the horse?

Well, I think that’s what happened when I recently wrote my post about how reluctant Lot was to leave Sodom. In spite of all the evil that surrounded him there and the coming destruction of the city, he lingered.

However, if we back up a few chapters in our Bible, we get a better feel for how Lot made decisions. I think that makes his hesitation a lot clearer.

Learn from Lot to look ahead and determine long-term results of your decisions.

You likely remember that Abram’s and Lot’s herdmen were arguing about the lack of land for their animals to graze on. Here was Abram’s solution.

“And Abram said unto Lot, Let there be no strife, I pray thee, between me and thee, and between my herdmen and thy herdmen; for we be brethren. Is not the whole land before thee? separate thyself, I pray thee, from me: if thou wilt take the left hand, then I will go to the right; or if thou depart to the right hand, then I will go to the left.” (Genesis 13:8-9)

It’s decision time for Lot. Does he pray about which way to go? It’s not recorded that he did. Here’s what we do know.

“And Lot lifted up his eyes, and beheld all the plain of Jordan, that it was well watered every where, before the Lord destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah, even as the garden of the Lord, like the land of Egypt, as thou comest unto Zoar. Then Lot chose him all the plain of Jordan; and Lot journeyed east: and they separated themselves the one from the other.” (Genesis 13:10-11)

Wow – like the Garden of Eden! Having just been to the Grand Canyon, I know what it feels like to be moved by the beauty of a great view. And seeing all that fertile land must have looked like hitting the jackpot if you want your flocks of animals to prosper.

In the world’s eyes, Lot just made a brilliant decision. From a human standpoint, we’d say, “Lot, you’re sure to be successful! You’ve got these beautiful fields for your animals to graze on. You’re close to a city where you can purchase anything you could need or want. You and your family can enjoy the finer side of life.”

Then we read this in Genesis 13:12-13.

“Abram dwelled in the land of Canaan, and Lot dwelled in the cities of the plain, and pitched his tent toward Sodom. But the men of Sodom were wicked and sinners before the Lord exceedingly.”

When we first read about Lot’s decision, we see what looks good in the here and now. What we don’t see right away is the end of the story. We couldn’t necessarily predict how Lot’s decision would affect his life, and the life of his entire family. If we could know in Genesis 13 how the sad and sordid story would play out in Genesis 19, we certainly would have warned Lot. We’d ask him to reconsider his decision.

What about Abram, left with what must have looked like the inferior option. Was he discouraged when he saw what he was left with? I don’t know. But isn’t God faithful, in the very next verses, to remind Abram of the promise He’d made to him? In spite of what the world might think – perhaps that he got the raw end of the deal – God knew the end of the story. He knew that Abram would be blessed.

“And the Lord said unto Abram, after that Lot was separated from him, Lift up now thine eyes, and look from the place where thou art northward, and southward, and eastward, and westward: For all the land which thou seest, to thee will I give it, and to thy seed for ever….Arise, walk through the land in the length of it and in the breadth of it; for I will give it unto thee. Then Abram removed his tent, and came and dwelt in the plain of Mamre, which is in Hebron, and built there an altar unto the Lord.” (Genesis 13:14-18)

So how do you and I make our decisions? Are we tempted to be like Lot and take the option that looks like it will benefit us the most right now?

The Bible says that the wisdom of the world is “foolishness with God.” (I Corinthians 3:19) We have to think past the now, the present, to where this may potentially lead us and our families. Our choice has to be based on more than what looks good today. Our decisions impact our children. We can’t see the end of the story from where we are currently, but God can.

I think we know where to start. Prayer. It’s back to James 1:5, and asking for the wisdom God promises to give.

Then get wise counsel. Those who’ve been doing life for a longer time and in a Godly manner may be able to see ahead in ways that we can’t. When we’re wrapped up in a difficult situation, we can lose perspective. I have to wonder if Lot’s story would have had a different ending had he asked Abram’s advice on what to do.

Finally, let’s make decisions using our “future” eyes instead of our “now” eyes. What seems to be the easiest or most obvious choice to make today may not be the best decision in the long run. Think through how your decision could play out, both positively and negatively.

As we seek God’s will, may our story end like Abram’s did in this chapter – resting in God’s promises, and with a heart ready to worship Him.

How to Have Peace in Your Home

June 28, 2017 by Tracey 4 Comments

With our daughters away at camp this week, my husband and I are getting some good one-on-one time together. We went on a date Monday night, and used a gift card we had to eat at Blossom Cafe. The food was delicious!

We’ll be celebrating our 26th anniversary next month. I’ve been thinking lately about how easy it is to become complacent in our marriages. Since I always want to be challenging myself to grow in that relationship, I started reading Gary Thomas’ book Cherish. I’m about halfway through, and have enjoyed learning ways to show my husband that I cherish him.

I also came across this quote (which I’ve shared before, but wanted to revisit) this week.

“I have come to believe that the two most potent peace-killers are the need to be right and the need to assess blame.” ~Donna Otto in Finding Your Purpose as Mom

How often, especially in my marriage relationship, do I feel the need to do one of those two things? Sadly, it is often over small, insignificant matters.

Let’s look at the first peace-killer as it applies to marriage.

Am I willing to get into an argument just to prove that I’m right about something? I’ll let you know that my personality type is such that I don’t like to be wrong (or maybe everybody’s that way?!!) I’m a perfectionist, and tend to think I’m always right. (Yes, I need a reality check.)

I hope I’ve learned over the course of the years that being right is less important than maintaining a loving spirit in the relationship. Even if I think (or know) that I’m right about something, does it really matter? Do I need to dogmatically defend myself just to prove that the story I shared was accurate? Do I need to show him the e-mail I saved so he can see with his own eyes that he put the wrong date on his calendar? There may be certain situations where demonstrating my “rightness” is important, but even then, I can approach him with humility.

I have also on occasion used this peace-killer with my children. But there are times when it’s not worth the argument to prove that they’re wrong about a certain thing. “You could be right,” can be a useful phrase at times, especially in a discussion with a teenager. (Ask me how I know…)

What about the second peace-killer, the need to assess blame?

If something goes wrong, we don’t always have to figure out who’s responsible and deal with it. (I had a great story to share here from the past week where I actually didn’t assess blame when I could have. Then I realized that someone I live with might read this, and feel like I was blaming them! So I’ll share a fictional story.)

Let’s say you’re on vacation and your husband made a hotel reservation. The family shows up to check-in, only to realize the reservation is for the wrong date. (No, I promise this did not happen to us while we were on vacation recently! It’s a made-up example that I have totally worried about happening to me when I’ve been in charge of the trip details!) Is there any point in getting all over for him for this mistake? Does it change anything? And finally, how many times have I messed something up, and been grateful when someone graciously overlooked my error?

Read about the two peace-killers, and what we can do to overcome them.

All of this leads me to what I believe helps us keep the peace in our homes, not kill it.

That word is grace.

If I want to have peace in my home, I should show grace to my husband and our girls. When we get lost following directions they’ve given or an argument arises over what day we last had spaghetti for supper, there’s no need for me to find fault or set myself up as the one who knows it all.

Just as I often need their grace extended to me when I mess up, so I must be willing to do the same for them. After all, isn’t that what God offers to us so freely? Rather than insisting that I’m right or making sure someone takes the blame for their blunder, I can offer grace. That will be a big step toward filling our home with a spirit of love and peace.

Saturday Salutes

June 24, 2017 by Tracey 2 Comments

Kristen writes about The Heartbreak of Social Media (And Why We Need to Take a Break From It).

Lisa-Jo says I Got Tired of My Scale Being the Loudest Voice in My Head.

Liz has 5 Questions for When You Need a Parenting Heart Check.

Jennifer shares How to Be Happily Married in a World of Unhappy Marriages.

Find 101 Genius Sidewalk Chalk Ideas to Crush Summer Boredom at What Moms Love. These are not only fun, but some are educational as well!

I’ll be spending today and tomorrow helping my girls get packed up to go to camp next week. Hope you have a wonderful weekend!!

Finding the Friend in the Seat Beside Me

June 22, 2017 by Tracey 5 Comments

When I was in elementary school, three friends and I formed a club. I can’t remember what we called it, but I do remember that we bought matching jackets. They were green with rainbow stripes down the sleeves! (And a belated thank you to Dad and Mom for paying for that special jacket!)

For many of us, wanting a group of friends to belong to starts at an early age. I can vouch for the importance of teen friendships as I watch my daughters learn how to navigate peer relationships. And even in my forties, I recognize the value of having friends to confide in as we walk through the seasons of life.

Because we have different personalities, you and I likely have unique struggles when it comes to friendships. But perhaps many of us can relate to this Instagram post from Lisa-Jo Baker that I scrolled past recently.

Sometimes — even when we’re minivan driving moms — I think our brains play tricks on us and make us think there is an elusive “cool kids” table. This is totally bogus. Instead I’m trying to retrain my brain to focus on the seat and the woman (or next door neighbor kid or family member) siting right in front of me or right next to me. It just takes practice.

I love this on so many levels. First of all, it’s comforting to know that I’m not the only one who thinks I’m not invited to the “cool kids” table!

And she mentions that this table is elusive. Yes, we’ve thankfully moved past the middle school days where there may have been an actual table in the cafeteria for what were considered the “cool kids.” But when we see that group of besties posting a picture on Facebook or Instagram of all the fun they’re having, we can feel like we’re missing out. If we’re not road tripping with our girlfriends or getting together for coffee with them once a week, we can feel lonely or left out. Insecurities about ourselves and our relationships can pop up at a moment’s notice.

So what’s the point of Lisa’s post? The question that came to my mind was, “Where’s my focus when I’m having those kind of thoughts?” On myself. It’s all “Woe is me.”

Who's sitting right beside me or in front of me that I can reach out to in friendship today?

Lisa’s challenge is to focus on another person. Who needs a friend? Who do I come into contact with on a daily or weekly basis that would love for someone to connect with them? Whether it’s my husband, my daughter, or my next door neighbor, I’ll likely have the chance to be a friend to someone today.

We could probably all quote Proverbs 18:24, “A man that hath friends must show himself friendly…” But sometimes I’m so wrapped up in myself that I don’t think about how to meet the need of another woman who may be lonely. Instead of wishing I had been invited to hang out with a particular group of women, I can ask to spend time with someone I’d like to know better.

As Lisa says, it takes practice. Putting others first, in any area of life, usually does. And every gesture of friendship I make may not lead to a long-term relationship with a “kindred spirit.” But reaching out to encourage another woman is always a good thing.

So instead of thinking about what I might be missing by sitting at a different table, let me focus on who is right beside me that I can befriend today.

Saturday Salutes

June 17, 2017 by Tracey 2 Comments

Bree writes about Teaching Yourself to Crave God’s Word.

Cassandra lists 7 Marriage Secrets of Successful Couples.

Kristen tells us How to Be Close to Your Daughter.

Joy shares 6 Best Audiobooks for Family Road Trips.

Jennifer’s video about Narcissistic Audience Members is spot on. It’s about 15 minutes long, but worth listening to!

I was craving something sweet one night, so I made a batch of these Oatmeal Coconut Dream Cookies. They’re some of the best cookies I’ve made in a long time!

And one more picture of the Grand Canyon…

Hope you have a wonderful weekend!

A Story of Unexplained Lingering, Abundant Mercy, and Persistent Prayer

June 16, 2017 by Tracey 3 Comments

Some nights I have a few minutes to read in bed before we turn out the lights. I recently decided to try reading a chapter in the Bible during that time. It’s not an “I have to do this before I go to sleep” thing, but I do like the idea of having God’s Word be the last thing going into my mind before I fall asleep.

I started at Genesis 1. I’m using the Bible app on my phone, so it automatically opens to the chapter I need to read next (and I don’t have to try to remember where I left off last time!) Genesis appeals to me because its stories are about people who sometimes struggled in their faith. I think we can all relate to that in some way! Since there’s no rush to get through the Bible in a particular time frame, I’m trying to really think about the story that’s unfolding as I read.

So I ran into Lot earlier this week. What an interesting character. I probably see way too much of myself in his story. He focuses on what looks good on the surface, makes selfish choices, and tries to fit into a world he’s not made for.

You know the story. Lot’s living in the midst of a wicked society in Sodom and Gomorrah. God has decided to destroy those cities because of their great sin. Abraham, Lot’s uncle, hears about God’s plan, and pleads for the city to be spared if there are a certain number of righteous people living there.

Two angels visit Lot the night before God’s punishment is to be unleashed. They tell Lot to warn his family about the impending doom. Morning comes, and the angels tell Lot to hurry. He needs to leave so he won’t be consumed along with the city. And here’s where I paused in my reading. Genesis 19:16.

“And while he lingered….”

Why Lot??? Why are you lingering? Don’t you remember what happened just last night? Those men who wanted access to your angel visitors were right outside your door. Then, when you didn’t turn the visitors over to them, they said, “This one fellow came in to sojourn, and he will needs be a judge: now will we deal worse with thee, than with them.” [verse 9] Is this a place where you still want to live?

Why do you want to stay? Is it because your wife is so enamored with the city? Or perhaps it’s because you’ll be leaving behind family and friends, maybe great possessions?

Yet before I’m too hard on Lot, let me take a look at my own life.

What is God is asking me to do that I’m holding back from since it would mean giving up time I want to spend on something else? Could there be a place He wants me to go, but I hesitate to leave the comforts that I have now? Is He asking me to give something up – a pastime, a habit – that I’m still clinging to, but need to release?

For whatever reason, Lot was reluctant to leave the city behind. So is there anything that I’m unwilling to give up? Is there any area in which this world has too much of a hold on me?

Let’s not be slow to obey God’s command or His call in our lives.

Since Lot lingered, the angels “laid hold upon his hand.” Why? The rest of verse 16 tells us. “The Lord being merciful to Him.”

In spite of those times when I allow worldly pleasures to distract me from what I should do, God is merciful. How thankful I am that His mercies are new every morning!!

I want to round out the story by looking at Abraham. We know that in chapter 18 Abraham was basically pleading with the Lord to spare Lot.

What if it was my child who fell prey to the allure of Sodom? I certainly hope that I would be as sincere and persistent in my prayer for her as Abraham was in his request for Lot.

And while I’m so grateful to say that I’m not in that circumstance right now, how much like Abraham can I be in praying that our girls will walk with God daily and not be drawn away from Him?

What did the angel tell Lot in Genesis 19:22? “Haste thee, escape thither; for I cannot do anything till thou be come thither.” The power of Abraham’s prayer and the faithfulness of God to Abraham meant that God wouldn’t act until Lot was safely out of the way. My prayer can have that same impact as I pour my heart out to God on my daughters’ behalf.

Finally, Genesis 19:29 says, “And it came to pass, when God destroyed the cities of the plain, that God remembered Abraham, and sent Lot out of the midst of the overthrow, when he overthrew the cities in the which Lot dwelt.” It wasn’t for Lot’s sake that God saved him, but for Abraham’s.

I’m challenged today to pray for my children in such a way that God will remember my prayers when He seeks to work in the lives of my children.