Girls To Grow - Nurturing moms in their walk with God

Saturday Salutes ~ When Kids Disappoint Us and Choosing Joy

July 14, 2018 by Tracey 4 Comments

Nancy tells us 5 Things Moms Need to Do When Kids Disappoint Us.

Brooks says I’m Unhappy with God’s Plan, But I Choose Joy.

Donna lists 5 Ways to Remember to Pray for Someone This Week.

Dave’s got good advice in Make Sure to Look Up.

If you’re looking for quality children’s books, check out The Good and the Beautiful Library. They are reprinting some old classics, many of which sound like interesting stories.

And the recipe of the week is this Broccoli Bacon Salad…which may or may not get made in my house, since I’m the only one here who eats broccoli. I’m thinking it would be a nice, simple lunch for me, though!

In honor of a friend who visited Prince Edward Island this week…

Hope you have a wonderful weekend!!

Pour Out That Complaint, Show Him Your Trouble

July 12, 2018 by Tracey 4 Comments

Certain sins trip us up so easily. Or maybe it’s just me…

Someone in our home (who is not my husband, lol!) has a tendency to complain. Actually, there’s more than one of us that get caught up in griping and groaning.

I love the dictionary definition of complain, which says it means to “express dissatisfaction or annoyance about a state of affairs or an event.”

Oh, how easy it is to be dissatisfied or annoyed! Those feelings can come from how another person acts, a situation that doesn’t go our way, or just random circumstances that we really don’t want to have to deal with in the moment.

We know from the Bible story of the children of Israel in the wilderness what God thinks about complaining. Numbers 11:1 says, “And when the people complained, it displeased the LORD…”

Often our complaints are about daily irritations. We’ve talked before about choosing gratitude instead of complaining, because you can’t do both of those at the same time!

Like David, let's take our troubles to the Lord, rather than complain to other people.

But sometimes, our “complaint” might be more along the lines of a personal hurt. Sure, it could be physical pain. It may also be an emotional struggle, like grief or regret.

I think that was the case with David in Psalm 142. As I read those seven verses, I’d say part of his complaint may have been loneliness. He also appears to be discouraged about people who are persecuting him. So how did he handle it?

“I cried unto the LORD with my voice; with my voice unto the LORD did I make my supplication. I poured out my complaint before him; I shewed before him my trouble. When my spirit was overwhelmed within me, then thou knewest my path.” ~Psalm 142:1-3a

Where David succeeded is where I often fail. I want to share my “complaint” with my husband, my family, my friends – or, realistically, with whomever will listen.

Yet in most cases, they likely can’t do anything to solve my problem. While they may care about me, they can’t provide me with peace or contentment.

Instead, I need to choose David’s solution. Whatever my current complaint or trouble, I need to deal with it by taking it directly to God.

Don’t you love the words David uses as he describes “pouring out” his complaint before the Lord? Let’s admit that sometimes we’re so full of our grievance that it just spills out of us. What a relief to empty ourselves of it, and allow it to flow over to a God who can handle it.

David also “shews” God his trouble. Yes, we can describe to Him every detail that is bothering us. After all, He already knows all about it. (And by the way, while my husband is a patient listener, I doubt he would have a problem with me taking these things to God instead of to him!)

Comfort comes as we realize that God knows our path. He is aware of exactly what is taking place in our lives. Not only that, He knows the end from the beginning. Perhaps God is just waiting for us to lay it at His feet.

Can we share a trouble with a loved one and ask them to pray for us? Absolutely! But let’s also remember to take each “complaint” to God. Trust Him to replace our “overwhelmed” spirit with His peace. And then we can join David at the end of the Psalm, praising God’s name.

Related posts:

Yes, It Really Is for Your Own Good

Not “Why Me?” But “Why Not Me?”

10 Key Lessons the Israelites Can Teach Us About the Christian Life

Saturday Salutes ~ Growing Faith, Hard Work for Kids, and Farmhouse Character

July 7, 2018 by Tracey 4 Comments

On July 4th, we took our daughters on a carriage tour of downtown Charleston. It had been years since my husband and I did one of these tours, and it was the girls’ first time seeing the city this way. Thankfully it was an overcast, cooler morning than usual for Charleston in July, and the Lord held off the rain until after we were back in the car!

Sarah gives us 6 Ways Small Prayers Grow Big Faith.

Kristen lists 15 Ways to Teach Kids How to Work Hard.

Cori shares Tips for Happy Travel with Kids.

Lauren has 18 Ways to Add Farmhouse Character to a Builder Grade House.

I made Rachael Ray’s Paillard “Pizzette” with Summer Pesto, Tomatoes, and Arugula for supper on Monday night. It sounds fancy, but it was easy to make, and oh, so good!! [Two notes: I didn’t use mint in the pesto, since I don’t care for that flavor. Also, I didn’t top the chicken with the arugula, just the tomatoes.]

Hope you have a wonderful weekend!!

4 Bible Verses to Hold on to as We Parent Teenagers

July 2, 2018 by Tracey 8 Comments

I’m writing fewer and fewer parenting posts these days. Which is interesting, considering that each day that passes gives me more experience as a parent. But it also reveals how little I know when it comes to raising these children that God has given us.

I used to think I knew a lot about being a mother. In the early years, most decisions were clear-cut. It’s fairly straightforward to discipline my child when she’s directly disobeying me, lying, or being mean to her sister.

Yet the older they get, the more that changes. I see parenting as less and less formulaic. Our approach depends more on the personality of that child, as well as their maturity level, and their history of making (or not making) wise decisions.

It’s become less and less about parenting through authority, and a lot more about exercising influence. Each year that passes has us releasing a little more control to them to make their own decisions.

All that to say that more than ever, I need guidance from God’s Word. The four Bible verses below are a foundation I know I need to return to again and again when I’m unsure of what to do. They apply no matter what stage of parenting we’re in, but have certainly become even more treasured as my girls get older.

When I'm struggling as a parent, these verses remind me that God has the answers I need.

“If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.” ~James 1:5

I need this verse every. single. day. I took part of this verse and made it the pass code for my smart phone. That way, every time I put it in, I’ll remember to pray for wisdom!

This verse is a promise. I simply have to recognize that I lack wisdom (not a problem!) Then I ask in faith, believing that God will give me wisdom, and He will. My husband and I have both experienced times when we were dealing with one of our daughters, and God gave us insight in that moment that we hadn’t had before!

“Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.” ~Hebrews 4:16

When it comes to parenting situations, I don’t always feel like I’m coming boldly…it’s more like crawling up to God’s throne begging for help! But that’s the place we need to be if we want to find the grace we need to get us through the hard days.

This also reminds me of the daily grace God provides to us, even when we sin yet again. In that same way, I need to extend grace to my daughter when she messes up…and she will. I don’t live perfectly, so why do I expect her to do so? While our children’s actions will produce consequences, it’s not wise to hold them over their heads or continually bring them up. We deal with it, we move on, and give grace.

“For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” ~Romans 8:38-39

Paul was persuaded that nothing could separate him from God’s love. The same is true of me, and of my children. No matter how they’re acting today (that’s driving me crazy) or the poor decision they made that I’m having to deal with, God still loves them.

And when, as parents, we lose our temper or miss an opportunity to invest in our children, God’s love for us is still there. It’s constant and comforting.

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.” ~Jeremiah 29:11

There may be a day when we experience disappointed hopes and dreams. Our children’s lives may not be playing out in the way we’d hoped. Our relationship with them may look different from what we’d mapped out in our minds when our children were little.

But God thinks about our children. He has thoughts about them, and plans for their future. Each part of their story can be used for His glory…as can ours.

How thankful I am for God’s Word that gives us hope and comfort for every situation we face!

Saturday Salutes ~ and the Best Book I Read in June

June 30, 2018 by Tracey 3 Comments

While it was quiet here on the blog this week, it wasn’t in real life.

Since my husband and older daughter were both gone for the week, I planned a few fun days with our younger daughter. We enjoyed ourselves immensely, but it will be nice to have everyone back under one roof again tonight! Looking forward to hearing all about our older daughter’s two weeks at camp when she gets home this afternoon.

Here’s a few good posts I found this past week.

Sarah Mae reminds us that God Delights in Our Pleasure.

Ayanna tells us Why All Kids Need Chores.

Whitney says “I Took My First Taste of the Empty Nest, and It’s Bittersweet.”

This Bandana Wreath is so cute, and I think even my craft-challenged self could make it!

And since I seem to be in the habit of sharing a recipe, this week’s choice is Amazing Cream Cheese Pound Cake. I want to make this soon, but I’m afraid of how much of it I’d eat all by myself!

I didn’t keep track of my fiction reading this month, but I did find time to make it through a number of books. Our library offers Hoopla, a digital media service, which allows me to borrow five books per month on my Kindle free of charge.

I did want to mention the nonfiction book I read this month. What’s It Like to Be Married to Me? by Linda Dillow was an excellent book on marriage! The author shared ten “dangerous” questions to ask yourself about what it’s like to be married to you. She shared numerous examples from women she’s counseled throughout her career. There’s also a brief Bible study at the end of the book.

I have a new post about 80% finished, so hopefully it will go up Monday or Tuesday. Have a wonderful weekend!

Saturday Salutes ~ 4th of July Crafts and the Cake I Made Last Weekend

June 23, 2018 by Tracey 4 Comments

Beautiful downtown Charleston at dusk

Kathie lists 7 Ways to Give Our Kids Purpose.

Angelina is Saying Goodbye to Martha Stewart Hospitality.

Katie reminds us of God’s Steadiness in the Storm.

Jill shares cute ideas in Celebrate Summer with Fun 4th of July Crafts.

I made this Pistachio and Coconut Cake last weekend for Father’s Day. It was delicious!!

Very excited that I’ll get to connect with my daughter today!! She’s been away at camp all week, and has another week to go. They don’t have access to their cell phones during the week, but get them for a limited amount of time on the weekend. I’ll have my phone close by all morning!

This past week we had Vacation Bible School at our church. There were several salvation decisions, and it was a good opportunity to serve in that ministry alongside others.

Hope you have a wonderful weekend!

Beware! Potential Danger Ahead if You Forget

June 21, 2018 by Tracey 5 Comments

I. am. forgetful.

“Old” age, perhaps? Information overload, maybe? Whenever my daughters ask me to do something, I give them free rein to remind me about it as many times as they need to! In the same way, if I don’t write something down while I’m thinking about it, it’s unlikely that I’ll remember it three minutes later.

Forgetting details like buying milk at the grocery store or what time I need to pick my daughter up from cheer practice can be inconvenient for us. But today I want to talk about a truth that’s important for all of us to remember.

When everything's going great, we can tend to forget God. Here's a warning to heed.

In Deuteronomy chapter six, Moses addresses the children of Israel as they prepare to enter the promised land. In verses ten and eleven, he shares the blessings that await them there.

“And it shall be, when the LORD thy God shall have brought thee into the land….to give thee great and goodly cities….and houses full of all good things….when thou shalt have eaten and be full;”

Sounds like things are going well here! But verse twelve follows with this warning.

“Then beware lest thou forget the LORD….”

When they finally reach the promised land…when they have plenty to eat, and are no longer surviving on manna…when they’re not moving a tent from one camping site to the next, but living in a house that’s “full of all good things”…that’s when they’ll be tempted to forget God.

In the wilderness, they needed Him for daily survival. Yet when they’re living in the midst of abundant blessings, Moses warns them – don’t forget.

They needed to remember all that God had brought them through, the deliverance from Egypt, the miracles in the wilderness. In a day when they might be tempted to look at what they had, and credit it to their own hard work, Moses says “no.” Remember all that God has done, and serve Him.

How about us? What a tragedy it would be, amidst all the blessings in our lives, to forget to give honor and praise to the One who provides it all.

I don’t want to forget how God worked through different situations this past school year. He brought us through some difficult days. He strengthened my faith, in spite of how weak it was in the beginning. Yet how easy it is to let days slip by without expressing gratitude to God for His goodness.

At times we, too, may start to take credit for what has happened. “It’s because I prayed for this” or “Since I’ve been living better, this good thing happened.” Yes, God answers prayer. Out of His mercy and grace, He moves in our lives. He blesses us as we honor and obey Him.

But I deserve nothing. And when the good and easy times come, I must remember to praise Him. Psalm 147:1 says, “Praise ye the Lord: for it is good to sing praises unto our God…”

By verse 14 of Deuteronomy six, Moses is talking about the Israelites choosing to go after other gods. If we forget to acknowledge God in our lives, we’ll have the same temptation. We’ll want to honor ourselves or find something or someone else to follow after.

On the other hand, just as the Israelites would face many battles before they actually possessed Canaan, so we may currently be in the midst of a trial. Despite all we’ve been given, maybe we just don’t “feel” blessed. On those days, may our minds be filled with the truths that God’s grace is sufficient, our eternal future is sure, and His power is limitless.

As we make this conscious effort to remember what God has done, we can then follow the command of verse seven.

“….thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children…”

In the day-to-day “busy-ness,” let’s remember to teach our children about the faithfulness and goodness of God. We can acknowledge all of our blessings, and give praise to the God who has provided them!

So beware! Be alert to the dangers of forgetting God and failing to praise Him. Then we can avoid the danger of living our lives outside of His guidance.

Saturday Salutes ~ Marriage Advice and Chocolate Cake

June 16, 2018 by Tracey 4 Comments

This picture from last year’s June vacation (near La Jolla Cove, CA) brings back some wonderful memories!

Dionna says Go Ahead, Thank Him.

Susan shares Must Do’s and Don’ts for Your Marriage.

This is an older post from Rachel, but worthy of revisiting – 20 Things I Will Not Regret Doing with My Kids.

Marci lists My Top 50 Cleaning Shortcuts.

This Chocolate Poke Cake from Scratch looks amazingly delicious! Maybe I can get one of my daughters to make it for us soon.

My oldest daughter will be packing her suitcase this weekend. She leaves on Monday for two weeks at camp, and it will be the longest she’s ever been away from home. We’re going to miss her!!

Hope you have a wonderful weekend!

10 Things We Can Give Away Today

June 13, 2018 by Tracey 3 Comments

So I think my husband and I have a great “working” relationship.

He teaches an adult Sunday School class at our church. Occasionally he’ll use a point or illustration from my blog in his lesson. Sometimes I’ll take a truth I’ve learned from his Sunday School lesson and write about it on the blog.

We’ve been studying Jonah recently. Our last Sunday School lesson touched on Jonah’s self-centeredness. The prophet Jonah had little compassion for anyone else. His focus was on following his own plan rather than going where God directed. Jonah, himself a recipient of God’s mercy, didn’t care about that mercy being shown to the people of Nineveh.

As I listened on Sunday, I didn’t need anyone to point out to me that I’ve been self-centered lately. I knew it. I’ve been complaining and feeling sorry for myself. Ever been there?

When we’ve been saved for awhile, I think we usually know when sin in our life needs to be dealt with. Typically, we know what to do about it. But that doesn’t mean it’s easy.

For example, I know that to combat my self-centeredness, I need to ask for God’s forgiveness and for the Holy Spirit’s help to overcome it.

My next step is to actively look for ways to serve others. That’s the best way to get over myself.

Philippians 2:3 says it pretty succinctly.

“Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.”

Or we can boil it down to the second greatest commandment, love your neighbor as yourself.

My self-focus will diminish if I turn my thoughts to giving to others. In this case, we’re not talking about money. Rather, there are more valuable things I can give away today that will bless those around me – and, in turn, help loosen the grip selfishness has had on me.

I can give…

1. …time to those things in my day that are most important in view of eternity. I’ll make it a priority to read my Bible, pray, etc.

2. …kind words to my family. That means thinking before I speak.

3. …smiles to people I come in contact with all through the day. I want to show them the joy that Christ gives.

4. …thoughtful gestures to my husband. I’ll think of ways, no matter how small, that I can bless him.

5. …encouragement to a fellow believer. Maybe it’s a phone call, a text, or a handwritten note that can bless a friend who’s struggling.

6. …thanks in each situation. The Bible tells me that’s the will of God for me.

7. …attention to what is going on at the moment. I won’t be distracted, but will give the person in front of me my full attention.

8. …the benefit of the doubt to someone when I don’t understand what’s going on. I won’t easily take offense or jump to conclusions about why they acted a certain way.

9. …appreciation to people who help and serve me. I don’t ever want entitlement to creep in!

10. …remembrance to needs people have asked me to pray for. Then I can follow up with them and find out how God has been faithful to work in their lives.

My natural bent is to be self-centered, but God’s Holy Spirit can empower me to be others-focused.

Since I’ve been dealing with a bout of selfishness lately, I hope that giving some of these things away will get me headed in a better direction!