Girls To Grow

Nurturing moms in their walk with God

What Can We Lay Down in 2025?

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Welcome to the first blog post of 2025! I hope you had a sweet season celebrating Christmas and ringing in a new year.

In the last few days of 2024, the phrase “lay it down” kept coming to mind. It’s been a while since I’ve done something like choose a word for the year. But I felt like God was impressing that particular phrase on my heart, so I’ve adopted it as my theme for 2025.

I’m not sure what it’s going to mean, like what I might be asked to lay down in 2025. But this is the Bible passage that I thought of as I considered those three words.

Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. ~Matthew 11:28-30

Lay it down. That scares me a little because what I think of first is surrendering things I may hold dear. But I also know there are bad habits, maybe obligations or relationships, and definitely recurring sins that I need to lay down.

How about you? Could there be some things you might need to lay down in the coming months? I already have a list of five things it would be good for me to lay down. See if any of them resonate with you or come up with your own list of things to lay down in 2025.

5 Things We Can Lay Down in 2025

1. People-pleasing

Do we say “yes” to things just so that someone will like us? Are we seeking affirmation and acceptance from other people or do we allow God to meet those needs?

As we (meaning me 🙂 find our identity in who we are as children of God, we learn to live for His approval. We’re confident in who we are and don’t need to perform to gain other people’s favor.

However, we do want to be helpful and show empathy and kindness. But we do it as unto the Lord, following his command to love our neighbor, not with the motive for them to like us.

2. Expectations

In this case, I mean expecting others to behave a certain way.

Here’s an example. We expect that our family will buy us a big, meaningful gift for Mother’s Day. We don’t mention it to anyone, kind of expecting them to read our minds. It’s not something that they do every year. We have no indication that they’ve even thought about the idea. But then we’re disappointed when Mother’s Day comes and goes without that happening.

I can have unrealistic expectations of other people and, at times, of myself. Laying those down will be a good goal for this year.

3. Doing anything in our own strength

How often do we set out to accomplish a task, teach a class, or face a conflict without asking God for his help? This year, I want to be so much more mindful of asking God for his strength and assistance in whatever I’m doing.

4. Critical thoughts and words

I can get wrapped up in my head thinking about what that person said or how they treated me. I can run down that person who, in my opinion, doesn’t measure up to what I think they should be.

Let’s lay down any thoughts that are critical of other people. Let’s ask God (because we can’t do it in our own strength) to free us from that. And when those thoughts start – because they will – let’s pull out a Scripture or a praise song and change the narrative in our minds.

Many Bible verses encourage us to guard what we say. If we get going with those critical thoughts, it’s easy for them to turn into words that are critical of others.

5. Pride

Proverbs 13:10 says, “Only by pride cometh contention…” Arguments and disagreements have one single source. Our pride. Sometimes that’s a hard truth to hear!

Pride is a constant enemy of mine, but as much as possible, I’d like to lay it down in 2025.

It’s impossible to know all that God might ask us to lay down in 2025, but I pray that our hearts will be open and sensitive to his leading.

Each month I plan to update this post with what I’ve needed to lay down. Let me know if there’s anything you know you’d like to lay down this year!

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Giving Thanks in a Year That Went Sideways

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Do you remember what 2020 was like? Sometimes it seems like it was so long ago.

At the beginning of the year, none of us could have predicted how it would unfold. Who could have foreseen a worldwide pandemic that shut down schools and many businesses, confined us all to our homes for a long period of time, and emptied store shelves of toilet paper and cleaning products?

Throw in some major hurricanes, wildfires, protests, and a contentious election season, not to mention the personal ups and downs we all experienced. It was certainly a year we’ll talk about for a long time to come.

Yet we still had a Thanksgiving that year. Maybe the celebration of the season looked different for our families than in other years. Our expectations changed from the traditional to whatever we could manage. And could we give thanks in a year that caught us by surprise and delivered more than its share of disappointment and devastation? Yes. We could, and we did.

Four years later, some of us may be having a year that went sideways in a different way. It could have been a death in the family, an extended illness, a job loss, a move, or the end of a relationship. And Thanksgiving is here again.

So how do we give thanks in hard times? No matter what a year brings us, here are eight things we can be thankful for in this season of gratitude.

Even in hard times, we can learn to give thanks. This Thanksgiving season, here are 8 things for which we can all be grateful.

1. God is faithful.

“Know therefore that the Lord thy God, he is God, the faithful God, which keepeth covenant and mercy with them that love him and keep his commandments to a thousand generations;” ~Deuteronomy 7:9

Our God still meets our needs and even gives us many of our wants. He has not left us to figure out our way through the mess alone. He is ever present and always acts according to His character.

2. His Word never changes.

We learned a little about change in 2020, didn’t we? And subsequent years continue to bring changes to our lives. Yet what the Bible said on January 1 is still true in November.

“The grass withereth, the flower fadeth: but the word of our God shall stand forever.” ~Isaiah 40:8

3. We were able to learn new lessons about God and ourselves in 2020…and in the year we’re in now.

We may not have chosen this particular method of instruction, but we learned lessons nonetheless!

Perhaps we learned to trust God more or made an effort to reach out to others in new ways. Maybe we developed a positive new habit or grew closer in our family relationships. Even though they’re hard, challenging times can help us mature.

4. We can always find hope in God’s promises.

There are certain days during a year that we need a healthy dose of hope! I’m always encouraged when I remind myself of God’s promises. And praying those promises can bless our soul, too!

5. His mercies are new every morning.

“It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.” ~Lamentation 3:22-23

We’ve been through some uncertain days, but His mercy hasn’t failed. We don’t know what tomorrow looks like, but He does, and will provide whatever mercy is needed.

6. As Christians, our life here on earth is as bad as it gets for us.

When we know Jesus as our Savior, Heaven is our eternal home. That, my friends, is something to be thankful for!

“In my Father’s house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also.” ~John 14:2-3

7. God hears and answers prayer.

Have you prayed more this year than you did before? We all have plenty of things to talk to God about! How wonderful to know that our God hears and answers prayer.

“And this is the confidence that we have in him, that, if we ask any thing according to his will, he heareth us: And if we know that he hear us, whatsoever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we desired of him.” ~ 1 John 5:14-15

8. God is good.

At Thanksgiving, can we always look back over the past nine months and say they were good? No, not in the sense we think of “good.” There were some good parts, but there were also hard, sad, disappointing, fearful parts.

But because God is good, I can trust that what He’s allowed to happen is part of His overall plan. And because God is incapable of doing anything else, His plan has to be good.

“The Lord is righteous in all his ways, and holy in all his works.” ~Psalm 145:17

Yes, we can give thanks in hard times. As we turn our hearts toward gratitude this Thanksgiving, let’s realize that no matter how crazy our year has been, we have much for which we can be thankful!

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How’s Your Memory? 4 Special Reasons to Remember God’s Work in Your Life

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A few weeks ago, I had a day full of a long list of errands to accomplish.

My final stop was the grocery store.  I’d made a list of ten to fifteen items I needed.  I’ve learned the hard way that if I don’t have a list when I go to the grocery store – even if it’s for five things – there’s a huge chance I’ll get home and realize I forgot the key ingredient I need to make supper.

Excited that I was almost ready to go home, I grabbed a grocery cart and headed to the back of the store.  About halfway to the dairy section, I realized I’d left my list in the car.  At this point, I was too focused on just getting done to walk all the way back to the car to retrieve my list.

I decided to rely on my memory – a risky proposition, for sure!  I checked out and put my bags in the car. Then I looked over at my list still lying on the front seat.  Thankfully, I actually remembered the most important items and only forgot stuff I didn’t need till later.  I have to admit to being pretty proud of myself that day!

Life moves fast. It's easy to forget God's past blessings. Yet there are specific benefits when you remember God's work in your life.

The reason I’m talking about remembering things today is because of a verse I noticed recently.  I was studying Gideon, and in Judges 8:34, we read what happened right after he died.

“And the children of Israel remembered not the LORD their God, who had delivered them out of the hands of all their enemies on every side.”

One of God’s frequent commands to the Israelites in the Old Testament was to remember what He’d done for them.  Remember means to bring something to mind, or to think about it again.

In the book of Deuteronomy alone, God specifically told His people at least nine times to remember what He did in bringing them out of Egypt.  (If you’d like to look those up on your own, here are the references. Deuteronomy 5:15, 7:18, 8:2, 8:18, 15:15, 16:3, 16:12, 24:18, 24:22)

Surely if God was so insistent on the Israelites remembering what He’d done for them, He would want us to do the same.  I found five verses in Psalms to encourage us in this area.

“And they remembered that God was their rock, and the high God their redeemer.” ~Psalm 78:35

God is my rock and my redeemer.  He is firm and unchanging, and I can always depend on Him.  Reflecting on any of God’s character traits will lead me to praise Him.

“Remember his marvelous works that he hath done; his wonders, and the judgments of his mouth;” ~Psalm 105:5

Reflecting on His works and His wonders also causes me to praise Him.  Whether I study the miracles of the Bible or look back at the wonderful ways He’s shown Himself mighty in my own life, I can recognize that whatever I’m currently facing is no match for an all-powerful God.

“I have remembered thy name, O LORD, in the night, and have kept thy law.” ~Psalm 119:55

I love how this verse mentions remembering the Lord’s name in the night.  If, like me, you sometimes have trouble sleeping, a great way to comfort yourself is to meditate on the names of God.

“I remember the days of old; I meditate on all thy works; I muse on the work of thy hands.” ~Psalm 143:5

This type of remembering isn’t just a passing thought.  No, we think on His works carefully, thoroughly, and seriously.

“Remember the former things of old: for I am God, and there is none else; I am God, and there is none like me,” ~Isaiah 46:9

We serve a great God.  He alone is God.  No one else can do what He can.  Only our God can keep His every promise

So why all the commands to remember?  Why was it important for the Israelites to remember how God delivered them?  What might it mean if you make it a practice to remember God’s work in your life?

Here are four benefits you have as you remember God’s work in your life.

1. It cultivates gratitude.

I think this quote from Ann Voskamp in her book, One Thousand Gifts, says it well.

“Remembering is an act of thanksgiving, this turn of the heart over time’s shoulder to see all the long way His arms have carried.”

How can we help but be grateful when we spend time remembering all that God has done for us?  In big ways and small, He has been faithful to love, guide, and watch over us.

2. It builds trust.

A God who has brought us through trials in the past can be trusted to carry us through whatever is ahead. Even if we’ve never faced this particular situation before, we can have faith that God will meet this need also.

Martin Luther said this. “Faith is a living, daring confidence in God’s grace, so sure and certain that a man could stake his life on it a thousand times.“

3. It brings blessings.

It was only when the children of Israel forgot what God had done that they left off worshiping Him, and followed after Baal and other idols.  Then God’s judgment came as punishment for their sin.  How much better if they (and we!) could stop the cycle by keeping God’s greatness always before us.

4. It causes all glory to go to God.

Remembering keeps us humble. We realize that God is the one who’s accomplished everything good and productive in our lives.  If it had been left up to us, what a mess we would have made of things! Yet God in His goodness and grace redeems our mistakes and continues to love and guide us.

So let’s work on our memories today! Take a few minutes to reflect on how God has worked in your life, maybe just recently. As you remember God’s work in your life, you can be confident in your future. We know, based on the past, that our God will continue to perform His will faithfully in our lives.

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Five Amazing Blessings of Answered Prayer

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“Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.” ~Philippians 4:6

We know the importance of prayer. I talk about it a lot here on the blog, from how to pray a prayer of praise to prayers for our homes and families to journaling our prayers.

Recently I was blessed to see God answer a prayer that’s been on my heart for months.  In His goodness and faithfulness, He granted the request.

As I thanked Him for His answer, I realized that certain blessings come along with having our prayers answered. Yes, we get an answer to our request, the granting of what we prayed for. But there are other benefits to answered prayer.

We pray. And when God answers our prayers, what does that tell us? Here are five amazing blessings of answered prayer.

Here are five amazing blessings of answered prayer.

1.  It reminds us that God loves us.

I already know this in my head. God sent His Son to earth to die for me so that my sins could be forgiven. When I trust Jesus as my Savior, I get to live with Him forever in Heaven. Yet prayer adds another layer to us grasping that love.

God hears our prayers and understands our concerns. Nothing happens in our lives that’s not allowed by Him. And just as a loving earthly father answers the requests of his child, so our Heavenly Father loves us and wants to give us good gifts.

2.  It encourages us to continue praying for other requests that we have.  

When we see a prayer answered, it reminds us that God is listening. He heard us asking for something, and He responded.

Maybe there’s something we’ve prayed about for years. Think of Zacharias and Elisabeth in Luke 1. How long had they been praying for a child? Likely for many years. They were living righteously, the Bible says, yet their prayer went unanswered…until it didn’t.

Having a prayer answered encourages us to continue praying about other needs.

3.  It helps us understand that God always wants what’s best for us and for those for whom we pray.

If it seems that He’s not answering our prayer, we can trust that He will work in His own way and in His own time to bring His will to pass. We pray with the limited knowledge that we have. Thank God for his Holy Spirit that intercedes for us and helps us when we don’t know what to pray. [Romans 8:26-27]

4.  It reaffirms in our minds that nothing is too hard for God. 

We know the Bible verses that say that nothing is impossible with God. Yet how exciting it is when we see God do something in answer to our prayer that seemed beyond what could be accomplished. There are times when it is especially evident that God has worked in ways that man cannot explain.

5.  It gives us another reason to praise Him. 

While we already have so much for which to be thankful, answered prayer is yet another reason to praise God. It also allows us to bring honor and glory to Him by telling others what He has done for us.

If you keep a prayer list, make sure to note when specific prayers are answered. Or maybe keep a separate list of answered prayers that you can review from time to time and use the list to praise God for all that He’s done.

May God grant us all the blessings of seeing answered prayer in our lives!

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Trusting God’s Grace When We Can’t See His Face

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Have you experienced times in your life when you felt alone in a trial? Did you struggle to have faith even though you know God’s Word tells us that He is always faithful? Was it hard to trust God’s grace?

Even when we don't understand what's going on in our lives, we can trust that God's grace, goodness, and faithfulness are still at work.

I remember a time when my “worst-case-scenario” self made an appearance. That’s the version of me that takes a minor medical issue and turns it into a terrible diagnosis.

My older daughter mentioned one evening that her eye was hurting a little bit.  The next morning, she said it was really bothering her.  She willingly took a couple of ibuprofen, which was a sure sign that she was in pain.  I started searching for an eye doctor and got her an appointment for the next afternoon.

However, when I picked her up from school that day, she said her eye felt better.  After hearing other symptoms she experienced, I decided it was probably a migraine.  Thankfully, she was still feeling better the following morning.  I canceled the doctor’s appointment and put my fears about this being the initial symptom of some terrible disease to rest.

We all have days when we’re not feeling well.  We get run down and struggle to find enough energy to get through the day.  And just like in our physical lives, we often experience ups and downs in our spiritual lives.

Sometimes I feel like things are going so well.  I’m experiencing victory over sin (as in I kept my temper when a certain teenager didn’t respond the way I would have liked).  Perhaps I stepped out of my comfort zone and spoke to someone about Christ.  Maybe I’ve seen a specific answer to prayer, or have been consistent with my morning devotional time all week.

Then there are the days when it feels like nothing is going right.  I’ve given in to an old familiar sin. I’m letting discouragement about a situation steal my hope. Or maybe I’ve been neglecting my Bible again.

I try taking it all to God, but I don’t seem to get any relief or find an answer for my problem.  It can feel like I’m just stumbling along on my own.  The words of Edward Mote’s hymn, “The Solid Rock,” comfort me in those times.

My hope is built on nothing less

“When darkness veils His lovely face,
I rest on His unchanging grace.”

When I can’t feel God’s presence or I’m overwhelmed by circumstances or grief seems to have a permanent grip on my heart, I know that God is still there.  He is present in my life.  

No matter what my feelings are in the moment, they don’t change the fact that God is good and is always with me.  I trust in His faithfulness because I’ve read about it in His Word and seen it evidenced in my life in the past.

I can ask God to reveal any sin in my life that might be hindering my fellowship with Him.  Then I can rest in His grace, waiting and hoping through those dark seasons, knowing that He is there for me.

And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, Lord, hast not forsaken them that seek thee. ~Psalm 9:10

Let’s learn to trust God’s grace even when we can’t see his face.

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3 Revealing Things That Keep Us from God’s Word

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Have you ever had an obstacle in your way that was keeping you from something very important?

Not long ago, my husband and our younger daughter were on a flight coming into Atlanta that had been delayed. By the time they landed, their next flight coming home was already boarding.

They became two of those people you see literally running through the airport trying to make it on the plane. (Our daughter said she’d always wanted to have that experience, but that once is enough!)

There were plenty of distractions and obstacles in their way. But their focus was on getting to that plane that would bring them home. And thankfully, they made it.

One of the key factors in our spiritual growth is spending time in God’s Word. Reading and studying our Bible teaches us about what God is like and how we can live our lives to please Him.

And while we might agree with the importance of being in God’s Word, it can be very easy to let other obstacles or distractions take the time or priority we want to give it.

Mark 4 gives us the parable of the sower and the seed.  In verses 18 and 19, we read the meaning of what happens to the seed that fell among the thorns. 

“And these are they which are sown among thorns; such as hear the word, And the cares of this world, and the deceitfulness of riches, and the lusts of other things entering in, choke the word, and it becometh unfruitful.”

Does this describe what happens to me?  I’m afraid that it feels that way sometimes.  When the Word of God isn’t producing fruit in our lives, it’s often because we’re allowing it to be choked out.

Let’s break the verse down to see three revealing things that “choke” God’s Word out of our lives.

The parable of the sower and the seed in Mark 4 gives us three revealing things that keep us from being in God's Word.

1.  Cares of this world.  

There are many of these in our lives, aren’t there?  This can be the day-to-day tasks we have, things like working, house cleaning, running errands, or taking kids to activities. All of these are good and necessary. But we don’t want to fill our lives with those and not leave ourselves time to read and meditate on the Bible.  

We need to put habits in place that help ensure we get time in God’s Word. Whether it’s first thing in the morning, during a lunch break, or before we go to bed at night, we can schedule a specific time and place to read our Bible.

Then we have bigger cares that take us away from God’s Word. Often we have seasons of particular stresses and worries that we can’t control. Caring for a sick child or parent, more work than usual, or traveling may change our routine. We can allow those responsibilities to take over our thoughts and minds. Yet often that’s when we need more than ever to hold fast to our time in the Bible.

2.  Deceitfulness of riches.  

This reminds me of materialism.  When our focus is on making money or accumulating possessions, we can ignore the necessity of grounding ourselves in God’s Word.  In fact, we can be less likely to go to God for help and provision when things are going well for us than when we’re struggling.

If we think that being rich or buying what we want will make us happy, we’re deceived.  However, it’s easy to get caught up in work and achieving success and allow our spiritual life to suffer.

3.  Lusts of other things.  

This category could include accomplishments for ourselves or our children. We have sports, hobbies, entertainment – the list of things to distract us from God’s Word can be quite long.  

These things aren’t necessarily wrong unless we allow them to choke out God’s Word in our lives. Once again, it’s about making time with God a priority. Let’s not lose sight of the eternal value of having our hearts convicted and challenged by digging into what Scripture has to say.

I struggle with all of the above at times and need to ask the Holy Spirit for His help. We can see fruit produced in our lives as we pull out the weeds of these other things that might distract us from being in God’s Word.

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Truth Over Feelings: 12 Bible Verses to Give You Hope

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“Truth has a powerful way of interrupting our runaway feelings if only we’ll get it in front of us.  So I let those verses march in front of me, boss me, redirect me.” ~Lysa Terkeurst in The Best Yes

How I can relate to having runaway feelings! 

My mind will be drawn to a topic or situation and before I know it, I’ve imagined every worst-case scenario. Or maybe I want to spout off to anyone and everyone about some injustice I’ve encountered.  (Insert note of thanks to a longsuffering husband who usually bears the brunt of these runaway feelings! 🙂

It’s easy to let our emotions take over.  But that’s where truth comes in.  The truth of God’s Word can quench the flame of our emotions. It can put our fear to rest or calm our worry or give peace for tension.

Rather than let my feelings of hopelessness, discouragement or other negative emotions take over my day, I want to let God’s Word rule my life.  Reading my Bible consistently is so helpful.

But going a step further and actually memorizing Scripture is key. It allows me to meditate on God’s Word and have access to truth whenever my emotions threaten to derail me.

Below I’m sharing verses that help redirect my thinking when I begin to struggle in a particular area.  I hope these are an encouragement to you! I’d also love to hear any verses that speak truth into your life when your “feelings” start to run away with you!

Here are twelve emotions that can derail us matched up with specific Bible verses to help us win the victory over those negative feelings.

When I’m scared…

“For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” ~2 Timothy 1:7

When I’m worried…

“Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.  And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” ~Philippians 4:6,7

When I’m discouraged…

“Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted within me? hope in God: for I shall yet praise him, who is the health of my countenance, and my God.”  ~Psalm 43:5

When I’m angry…

“For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God.” ~James 1:20

When I’m discontent…

“Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content.” ~Philippians 4:11

When I need wisdom…

“If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.” ~James 1:5

When I feel unloved…

“But God, who is rich in mercy, for his great love wherewith he loved us.” ~Ephesians 2:4

When I’m disappointed…

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.” ~Isaiah 55:8,9

When I need direction…

“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.” ~Proverbs 3:5,6

When I’m impatient…

“Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for him: fret not thyself because of him who prospereth in his way, because of the man who bringeth wicked devices to pass.” ~Psalm 37:7

When I feel inadequate…

“I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.” ~Philippians 4:13

When I’m overwhelmed…

“Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” ~Matthew 11:28

What wonderful truths we find in God’s Word to help us gain victory over our emotions! I pray that I will allow God’s truth to implant itself in my heart so that I can live out His calling and bring glory to Him.

Are there other negative emotions you struggle with?  Let’s find a verse of truth to help redirect our thinking!

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5 Tips for Embracing Our Life Season in 2024

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Welcome to the first official Girls to Grow blog post of 2024! I hope your new year is off to a good start.

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I’ve just finished reading a great book, my first one of the new year. It came from my dad’s library and was literally falling apart. There were lots of loose pages that I had to stick back in at their right spot 🙂 I enjoyed it so much that I’ve now ordered a new copy for myself.

The book is titled Acts of God: Why Does God Allow So Much Pain? by Bob Russell with Rob Suggs. It’s kind of a reframing of the age-old question, “If God is good, why do bad things happen?” The authors follow the life of Joseph from Genesis and use the ups and downs in his life to demonstrate the truths they outline in the book.

I love this quote from the book.

Whatever season of life you’re moving through right now, God is with you. He is using this moment to prepare you for another time or another opportunity. Neither tough times nor tender ones last forever. But the purposes of God are eternal.

I think this is so fitting to consider as we’re starting a new year. We’re each in different seasons of life. You could be single, newly married, parenting small children, empty-nesting, or in your later years of life.

Below I’ve listed five tips we can use to embrace our life season, whatever it looks like, in the coming year. I’ve partnered each one with a Bible verse for us to consider.

Read through these five tips that we can use as we seek to embrace God's plan for our current life season in the new year.

1. Recognize that each life season has its blessings and difficulties.

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: ~Ecclesiastes 3:1

You probably know how the rest of that passage goes. A time to be born, a time to die. A time to weep, and a time to laugh. A time to mourn, and a time to dance, and so on.

Whatever season we’re in, there are good parts about it. I’m in the empty-nest season. I love having a lot of time for my husband and me to do things together. Yet there are times I miss being able to see our daughters as often as I did when they lived at home. But I’m so happy that they are thriving in the places God has them for now.

It’s okay to sit in those conflicting emotions. Acknowledge the difficulties, count the blessings, and see how God will work where you are.

2. Remember that God is with you in every season.

Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee. ~ Hebrews 13:5

That’s a promise. It doesn’t matter if you feel like God is with you where you are or not. He is there.

3. Realize that God is using this season to prepare us for the next one.

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. ~Jeremiah 29:11

Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ: ~Philippians 1:6

What a blessing to realize that God has a plan! He’s not randomly directing our lives based on a whim.

Whether it’s a blessing or a trial, each one is sent to teach us something about God and how he works. We won’t be ready for the next opportunity if we’re not learning from the situation God has us in now.

4. Rest in knowing that God’s purposes are eternal.

For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory; While we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal. ~2 Corinthians 4:17-18

We see the here and now. He sees forever. What God is accomplishing in this season is for our good and his glory here, but also with a long-term focus that we may not understand.

5. Respond to what God is doing in our lives by yielding to and trusting in His plan.

For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure. Do all things without murmurings and disputings: That ye may be blameless and harmless, the sons of God, without rebuke, in the midst of a crooked and perverse nation, among whom ye shine as lights in the world; ~Philippians 2:13-15

I may not always like God’s plan; I’m pretty fond of my own, and they may not always match up. I might want things to happen faster or play out differently. But I’m called to have faith, to trust God no matter what.

I hope that these tips will help all of us move into this year with peace and contentment.

I’d love to hear something you’re currently loving in the life season you’re in! Let me know in the comments or click on the “Contact Me” tab at the top of the blog and send me an email.

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How to Move Forward When We Don’t Know What to Pray

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Are you ready for the unofficial start of fall? With Labor Day weekend just ahead of us, I’m starting to feel like fall is here. Which is fine, as long as I don’t expect the weather to cooperate! 🙂

Has there been a time in your life when you weren’t sure how to pray about a situation? Maybe it involved a spouse or a child, a financial decision, a job change, or a move to another state. Perhaps you just couldn’t get clear direction. And we’ve likely all had times when we were just so overwhelmed with life that we couldn’t even think clearly enough to know how or what to pray.

When we’re not sure how we should pray or what to ask for, here’s a list of five things we can do.

Here are five steps we can use to help us move forward when we don't know what we should ask God for or how we should pray about a situation.

1. Believe that the Holy Spirit will help us.

“Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered.” ~Romans 8:26

The Holy Spirit knows the mind of God. He intervenes for us and speaks to God on our behalf. The Spirit strengthens us when our faith is weak. He can take the deep, inexpressible cries of our hearts and bring them before God. When we’re perplexed about how to pray, He already knows what’s best for us.

2. Find Bible examples of how others prayed in difficult situations.

We know that David often cried out to God in the Psalms. In chapter 59, verse 1 as he deals with enemies, he writes “Deliver me from mine enemies, O my God: defend me from them that rise up against me.“

There’s Hannah’s prayer for a son when she was barren in 1 Samuel 1:11. “And she vowed a vow, and said, O Lord of hosts, if thou wilt indeed look on the affliction of thine handmaid, and remember me, and not forget thine handmaid, but wilt give unto thine handmaid a man child, then I will give him unto the Lord all the days of his life…”

And our ultimate example is Jesus in the garden before His crucifixion. In Matthew 26:39, we read, “And he went a little farther, and fell on his face, and prayed, saying, O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt.“

3. Pray to God directly from His Word.

Find a verse that pertains to what you’re facing or one that brings you comfort and just pray it to God. I often take Proverbs 3:5,6 to pray for myself or someone in my family.

“Lord, help me to trust you with all my heart and not rely on my own wisdom or understanding. May I acknowledge You in every area of my life so I can know that you will direct my path.“

4. Write out what you’re struggling with.

I realize that this is easy for me because writing is one of the best ways I have to process my thoughts. Even if that’s not true for you, try to at least write out a sentence or two that summarizes how you’re feeling. Sometimes just seeing it written down on paper can help you gain a better perspective. This practice might guide you in how to pray.

5. Remember that God knows our hearts and our minds even when we can’t fully express what we need or want.

We’re likely all familiar with Psalm 139. “O Lord, thou hast searched me, and known me. Thou knowest my downsitting and mine uprising, thou understandest my thought afar off. Thou compassest my path and my lying down, and art acquainted with all my ways. For there is not a word in my tongue, but, lo, O Lord, thou knowest it altogether.” [Verses 1-4]

What a comfort it is to know that God knows us so deeply and individually! He knows us better than we know ourselves and is so faithful to meet our every need. When we don’t know how we should pray or what we should ask for, He is still able to give us exactly what we need.

I remember a time a few years ago when I was confused and heartbroken over a particular situation. Honestly, I didn’t feel like praying. I didn’t have the words to tell God how I was feeling. Yet as always, He was faithful. He brought me through those days and I learned more about Him and about myself.

In the days ahead when we struggle to know how to pray, may we remember to rely on the Holy Spirit’s help, look to God’s Word, and rest in the fact that God knows our hearts and will continue to keep us in His care.

[I updated and republished this post from June 2021 because I find I need it again in August 2023.]

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That Time I Had a Pity Party

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Have you ever thrown yourself a pity party?

I was curious to see if there was an actual definition for “pity party” and, of course, there is. Dictionary.com says it’s “an instance of feeling self-indulgently sorry for yourself.” In the story that I’m sharing below, I’d say that sounds about right.

It wasn't pretty. Three guests were there. And here's how I hope to avoid this party next time.

A few weekends ago, I was struggling. I was emotional and discouraged and questioning God about some things. We can call it a full-blown pity party and the sad thing was, I just wanted to stay at the party.

As I look back on it now, I can recognize who my guests were at the party.

Ingratitude.

Instead of counting my blessings, as the hymn says, I was observing things I didn’t have that I wanted. That mindset will never get us anywhere good.

Self-focus.

As is often the case for me, pride was at the root of my struggle. I wanted what I wanted…but that wasn’t necessarily what God wanted for me.

Lies.

I chose to ignore truth and listen to the lies of Satan.

I knew that the thoughts running through my head were not based on Scripture. Rather I was allowing my emotions to dominate my thinking.

This particular pity party lasted much longer than it should have. I was comfortable with those guests and they were having a good time.

Then slowly but surely, truth slipped in. As I allowed what I knew about God through His Word to seep into my mind, the lies and the pride and the ingratitude had to find a new place to hang out.

So what truths made the difference?

God loves me.

In fact that Sunday morning our Pastor preached a sermon from Psalm 139. And do you know what verse jumped off the page at me?

How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! how great is the sum of them! [Verse 17]

When I wanted to think that God didn’t love me or had forgotten about me, here came those words. In the midst of my doubts, He sent reassurance from His Word.

God forgives me.

When I think back to how stubborn I was being, I’m ashamed. But thank God for His forgiveness.

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. ~1 John 1:9

God is faithful to forgive our sins. That means He’ll do it every time when we confess them.

As undeserving as I am, God continues to bless me.

God’s mercy and grace are unexplainable. If my child had reacted to me the way that I did to God in this circumstance, I might want to make them earn their way back into my favor.

But throughout the following week, I knew God was blessing me in different ways. I’m unworthy, but He continues to demonstrate His grace.

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning. ~James 1:17

Was that the last pity party I’ll host? Probably not. But I hope the next one’s much shorter. I hope I’ll recognize it for what it is and kick those guests to the curb before they have time to get comfortable.

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