There’s a reason they’re called growing pains.
And I’m the one experiencing them, not my “nearly a teenager and I can hardly believe how tall she’s gotten” daughter.
On second thought, I’m sure she has them, too, but on this particular day, they were mine.
The pains aren’t physical, though they’re in my heart. It’s the tears that flow when I send her off for the day with a group of church teenagers, wishing and hoping that she’ll have a good time. It’s praying the day away – for her safety, for her to make wise decisions, for her heart to be open, for her to be sensitive to the needs of others, for her not to feel foolish or embarrassed, for her to meet all that comes with a happy heart and a clear conscience, for her not to lose her spending money.
Yet if the day brings hard things, new experiences, even these will be good for her, will teach her valuable lessons, give her an appreciation for the ordinary, and help her know what to do the next time.
It’s the pain of emotions I struggle with, wanting to hold her close, yet aching for her to have the confidence to be free.
Then she returns, the day and her energy spent, full of anecdotes and laughs and I listen as she shares her day.
I doubted, worried – all for naught. And my faith in God is once again strengthened. He carried her through; He carried me through. And this is just the beginning. Days like this will begin to come more quickly than I can handle them. She and I will grow and stretch in ways I’m sure I can’t imagine from this vantage point.
While the “firsts” you’re facing with your children may be different than mine, may we all grasp the fact that we can trust God with these precious gifts. He loves them far more than we, in our humanity, can. And while the tears and doubts and struggles will resurface on other occasions, I know, time and again, and again, and again, He will carry us through.
Mama S says
first of, that gorilla scared me when I scrolled down the picture, lol wasn't expecting that hehe.
second, you daughter is growing into one beautiful women 🙂
thirdly, isn't true that as our girls grow, so are we!!!!
Ha – that picture was from our trip to Zoo Atlanta last week! We all loved the gorillas; there were a couple of babies and we stood for awhile and just watched them play.
We as moms are so blessed to watch as our little girls grow into young ladies. We're obviously in the middle of that process here and it takes courage and the wisdom that only God can give. I'll be enjoying watching your little ladies as they grow up!!
Thanks for being honest with your "growing pains." Oh, the things I have to look forward to, and honestly, I think it's harder for those of us who homeschool, to let our kids go like you did because we're used to having them around all day, under our protection. I mean, I don't even like to let Sarah Beth go to her homeschool co-op class by herself! 🙂
Well, don't tell my girls, but after I let them off at one door for homeschool co-op classes, I drive around to the glass door on the other side of the building where I can see my oldest walk by and go into her classroom. I just feel more secure knowing she made it all the way there! 🙂
Awww, I think that's so sweet!!!!!!!
aurie good says
I am the same way! My heart clenches when I send the girls off to their classes at MOPS or CC, and my momma heart wants to make sure that everyone is nice to them. Sigh.