It was a relatively easy choice for me to become a stay-at-home mom when our first daughter was born. While I know that may not be the case for everyone, we had planned from the beginning of our marriage that once we had children, I would be at home with them. While there were times it may have been challenging, both personally and financially, I don’t for one minute regret that decision.
However, now that both girls are in school for a good part of the day, I have been at loose ends as to how best to go on from here. My husband and I agree that a typical J-O-B will not work for me at this point. He has been so very patient with me as I struggle with how best to handle this stage of our lives. I want to be home with my girls during school breaks and summer vacation as well as be available to volunteer in their classrooms and accompany them on field trips; or, as happened yesterday, pick them up from school when they’re not feeling well.
I am trying to use my time at home wisely, planning and preparing meals ahead of time and keeping up with household chores. There is time to run errands and get necessary shopping done so that I can come home and attend to the girls when they are finished with school. (And trust me, they appreciate me not dragging them from store to store on the way home!)
I’m even finding, in the extra moments of quiet, additional time to pray for my husband and daughters. While I’m not lacking in things to keep me busy during the day, I have really struggled with wanting to make a monetary contribution to the family. Human though it may be, there is also the wish for self-fulfillment and the desire not to miss some opportunity that God may have for me.
For any of you in this same stage of life, or those who expect to face it one day soon, I think you would find this post at Amy’s blog as helpful as I did. It encouraged me and helped me remember to consider what is best for our family as we move forward. I would still like to find some way to bring in a bit of extra income, but am trying to be patient and realize the value and responsibility of the role I have in being a full-time, stay-at-home wife and mother.
I have been struggling with this issue since having my daughter. I chose not to go back to work after her birth because I wanted to be the one to raise her, not strangers in a day care center. I'm a single mom (dad was not in the picture until later and I think he only showed up then so his mom could have access to her granddaughter). The last 4 yrs have been a struggle both financially and emotionally, but I don't regret my decision at all. My daughter is now old enough to go to Pre-K (she is there from 7:30 am to 1:30 pm) and that freed up my time to find a job. I was so blessed to find a part-time job cleaning vacant apartments here at the apartment complex where we live. It could not have worked out better! Your girls are so very luck and blessed to have a mom like you. Maybe you can find something close to home and part-time that way you can still bring in a little money. Have you considered babysitting? I know that is a great way to bring in extra income and still be available for your family. Just a thought. I'll keep you and your family in my prayers.
Thank you for sharing and I will check out that post on Amy's blog. I am a stay-at-home mom now, and already wonder what I'm going to do when my child (or children if we have more) go to school. If we choose not to homeschool. I actually babysit two days a week now, in someone else's home. I take my toddler with me, it helps us earn a little extra money, and my little one thinks it's great to play with someone else's toys!
Amy @ Finer Things says
This is a great post, Tracey. The "J-O-B" 🙂 I had to laugh at that. Whatever (or whoever) in the world made that such an important thing?!
I babysit part-time for a family whose mom just started working. They have a 4th grader, 1st grader, and preschooler. The mom is STRESSED. Our of the 6 days in the last two weeks that I was supposed to have the kids, I've had them only TWICE. They've had pinkeye, ring worm and other stuff. Mom is realizing that holding down a J-O-B even with school kids is HARD.