Girls To Grow

Nurturing moms in their walk with God

Turning Change Into Opportunity

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Happy 2019!! I hope each one of you is enjoying a good start to the new year.

It’s a time of fresh beginnings and renewed purpose. Everywhere I look people are posting their goals, resolutions, and words for the year.

I’m honestly not feeling a lot of motivation for setting goals. And while I’ve occasionally chosen a word for the year, it’s not something I’ve done recently.

But this year, I’m going back to the word idea. I want a focus for this year, a way to make sure I’m accomplishing something worthwhile.

At first I thought choosing a word would be easy. With a daughter graduating high school and heading off to college in 2019, my word would be change.

Her life will change, but our lives here at home will change just as much. Beyond the bittersweet nature of her leaving, and knowing we will miss her, is how the change will effect our everyday lives.

As I thought about it, though, I realized that change is kind of a word that’s been chosen for me for 2019. I decided to actually choose a word on my own.

And that word is opportunity.

It's not the word that was chosen FOR me, but one I chose for myself.

I wanted to twist the change that’s coming into an opportunity. Hopefully I’ll be encouraged to approach it in as positive a light as possible!

There are six areas in which I’d like to apply this word. In 2019, I’ll look for opportunities to…

~ grow in my walk with God. I’m recommitting to memorizing Bible verses, which I’d slacked off of in the last couple of years. I expect my trust and faith to be stretched with a daughter hundreds of miles away, so I need to always have God’s Word fresh in my mind!

~ serve others. This doesn’t come naturally for me, so I want to keep this idea in the forefront of my mind. It doesn’t have to be big or noteworthy; in fact, the little ways in which I can serve others can be the most meaningful.

~ share my faith. Another spiritual area where I desperately need to grow, especially in my boldness. I need to remember to pray for opportunities to tell others about Christ. He wants the gospel shared, so I believe He will open doors for me to do just that.

~ strengthen relationships. This starts with my immediate family. I want to intentionally do things with and for my husband. In the second half of the year, I’ll get to develop a new “long-distance” relationship when my older daughter goes off to college. Then I’ll also have lots of one-on-one time with our younger daughter!

Over the last few years, I’ve realized the value of friendships. Near the end of 2017, a lady invited me over to her house for coffee. We’d known each other for a long time, and saw each other occasionally, but weren’t close. We had such a good time that day just talking and catching up, that we decided to schedule another coffee date. Ever since then, we’ve gotten together once a month. It’s been such a blessing, and all because she took the time to reach out to me. I want to be that friend for someone else.

~ try new things. Okay, I really like staying in my comfort zone, but I want to get better at stepping outside of it. One of my husband’s Christmas gifts is helping me out here! He gave me a gift certificate so we could have a private lesson in ballroom dancing at a studio here in Charleston. This is something I’ve wanted to do for a long time. We’d talked about taking lessons once the kids were grown and gone, but now we’ve moved that schedule up! He may be sorry since coordination isn’t a natural gift of mine, but I’m really looking forward to it!

~ use this blog to encourage others. I want to be more consistent in writing and putting out helpful content. I know I need to set some goals in this area to motivate me to do better.

Finally, I want to claim these verses for 2019, to meditate on them as I go throughout the year.

“Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee; because he trusteth in thee. Trust ye in the Lord for ever: for in the Lord Jehovah is everlasting strength.” ~Isaiah 26:3,4

To live in peace as I trust in God, and to rely on His everlasting strength will make 2019 a great year!!

So that’s a lot about me in one post, but I hope you’ll find some encouragement here as you plan for the year ahead.

Let me know if you’ve chosen a word for 2019. Is there something specific you want to accomplish? I’d love to know what you’re planning for the upcoming year!

Saturday Salutes ~ Top Ten Posts from 2018 and the Books I Read in December

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We continued our Christmas Eve tradition of going out for dessert in downtown Charleston and touring the hotel lobby at Charleston Place.

I didn’t do much blog reading this past week, so I thought I’d share the books I finished in December, as well as recap the top posts from the blog this past year.

I only read one non-fiction book this month.

I recommend How to Break Up With Your Phone by Catherine Price if you’re serious about limiting the amount of time you spend on your phone.  In the first half of the book, she outlines the issues we often have with our phones.  Those include addiction, changes in your brain, the effects of social media, and how advertisers want to program us to be on our phones as much as possible. 

The second half lays out a plan for being more mindful users of our phones. She doesn’t suggest getting rid of your phone, but rather learning to use it mindfully.  Don’t let it be your default when you’re bored, or allow yourself to just mindlessly scroll.  There’s a 30-day program in the book, which includes plenty of helpful tips including taking a “phast” from your phone.  This was a relatively short book, but definitely helpful.

I finished four fiction books this month.

Celia Garth by Gwen Bristow is set in Charleston during the Revolutionary War.  Nikki recommended this book, and I’d say it was one of my favorite reads this year.  It’s an older book, and reminded me of the kind I read as a teenager.

Catching Christmas by Terri Blackstock was a quick read that I also really enjoyed.  It was a sweet story about an old lady, her granddaughter, and a cab driver.

Amy Snow by Tracy Rees was an entertaining book with a nice mix of mystery and romance.

The final one is Murder at the Brightwell by Ashley Weaver.  It was an Agatha Christie type novel.  That’s not a genre that I normally read, but this was another fun book as well.

I didn’t publish as many posts here as I have in previous years.  Life has felt a bit busier in general, and I’m definitely focusing on making the most of these last years of high school with my daughters.  That being said, I do hope to be a little more consistent with my writing in 2019. 

Here’s a countdown of the top ten posts (according to Google analytics) published here on Girls to Grow over the past year.

10. This Is What Our Souls Need

9.  3 Ways to Strengthen Your Marriage

8.  4 Bible Verses to Hold On To As We Parent Teenagers

7.  7 Ways to Prepare Your Heart for Christmas…(Especially if You’re Not Feeling It Yet)

6.  10 Things We Can Give Away Today

5.  5 Ways to Pray for Your Husband

4.  5 Bible Promises to Pray Over Your Life Today

3.  5 Prayers to Pray for Your Children Every Day

2.  Don’t Be a Fool: 5 Things to Avoid if You Want to Be Wise

1.  How I Want God to Answer My Prayers

If you have a favorite post that didn’t make the list, let me know what it was!  Hope you have a wonderful weekend as we prepare for 2019!!

Merry Christmas 2018

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From our family to yours, Merry Christmas!!

May the love, joy, and peace that only Jesus can give be yours today, and the whole year through!

Saturday Salutes ~ What NOT To Do This Holiday Season and a Video

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Alia writes about The Waiting and Hope of Advent.

Stacey shares help For the Days When You’re Tired of Living with a White-Knuckled Grip.

This is an older post, but a great reminder of 10 Things to NOT Do This Holiday Season.

Ann has 9 Cozy Winter Favorites for the Cold and Dreary Season.

It wasn’t until we were in New York City a couple of weeks ago that I realized everyone in the family likes bruschetta.  I’d ordered it in restaurants before, but this time my husband and daughters ate it, too.  Ater we got home, I made The Pioneer Woman’s Bruschetta and it was so tasty!!  I’ll definitely be making it again.

The video below is from our daughters’ school Christmas concert last week. This handbell song was my favorite of the four they performed. I was sitting pretty far back, so the video’s not as clear as I would have liked. Our daughters are the third and fourth ones in, if you start with the line of girls at the first table.

Just one Christmas party left, which is our Sunday School class breakfast tomorrow morning. All of the shopping and most of the wrapping is done, so I’m looking forward to a low-key Christmas Eve day. Hope you have a wonderful pre-Christmas weekend!

Don’t Let the Kids Be the Only Ones Anticipating Christmas

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Anticipation.

If you want a picture to go along with that word, I can’t think of one that’s more appropriate than that of kids waiting for Christmas to arrive.  

As a child, I remember my two younger brothers getting up VERY early on Christmas morning.  At some point they’d come into my room, so excited to go downstairs and wake up my parents so we could open gifts (and eat candy from our stockings for a little pre-breakfast sugar high!)

Take time to anticipate the wonder of Christ's birth this Christmas season.

As adults, I think we generally anticipate Christmas a little (or a lot?) less.  We face more responsibilities.  There are presents to buy, food to make, holiday events to attend, and Christmas parties to fit into an already busy schedule.

And while we’re never too old to get excited about gifts, Christmas becomes about a whole lot more.  We treasure the joy others get when they open presents we’ve chosen just for them.  Getting together and spending time with family becomes much more of a focus…though there’s still a lot of excitement about the candy and other good food!

All that to say that our anticipation level for Christmas can be fairly low at times.  But in these last few days before Christmas, I hope we can slow down and really anticipate what’s to come.  Let our whole focus not be the gifts or the food or the family celebrations as much as marking the significance of Christ’s birth.

I love the definition of anticipate from the Cambridge Dictionary.  It defines it as “to imagine or expect that something will happen, sometimes taking action in preparation for it.”

Thinking all the way back to the first Christmas, Joseph and Mary must have experienced incredible anticipation.  Many of us can identify with anticipating a child’s birth.  But what about a child that has been said to be the Messiah?  One whose birth was foretold to both Joseph and Mary by angels!  How exciting!!

Since long before then, though, God’s people had been waiting for a Savior.  God told Adam and Eve in Genesis 3:15 that the seed of the woman would bruise Satan’s heal.  From then on, the anticipation of God fulfilling His promise was a hope for all mankind.

And just as our God is always faithful, so He provided His Son as that seed.  The anticipation from the centuries before was brought to pass on a quiet night in Bethlehem.

In this last week before Christmas, let’s try to find a bit of the wonder and anticipation of the season.  This message is for me.  Me, with a few presents still to buy and wrap, a couple more parties to bake for, and a Christmas dinner to cook.  Let me not get so caught up in the last minute details and preparations that I forget to marvel in the glory of the greatest gift ever given.

“And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.  For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord….And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.” ~Luke 2:10, 11, 13, 14

Thank you, Jesus, for coming to earth.  This was the initiation of God’s plan for my redemption, the redemption of the whole world.  Thank you, God, for the gift that was perfect and that only You could give.  

Saturday Salutes ~ And a Recap of Our NYC Trip

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Last weekend we took our daughters to New York City.  Since our oldest turned 18 on December 1st, and our youngest turned 16 on December 3rd, it was a “once-in-a-lifetime” type birthday trip for them.

We’d all been to New York City before, but never at Christmas time.  It was nice to see the city all decked out in holiday decorations.

Our younger daughter wanted to go up in the Empire State Building at night, so we headed there after walking around Times Square on Thursday night.  Beautiful views, but cold and SO windy!

On our way to Rockefeller Center Friday morning, the girls recognized this setting from several Hallmark Christmas movies.

We were headed to Rockefeller Center because the girls wanted to go ice skating there.  Mission accomplished!

After ice skating (and a bit of shopping in Times Square), we walked around Bryant Park.  If you’re ever in the city during the holidays, I highly recommend this.  There were all types of vendors set up around the park, and there was an ice skating rink there as well.  Our older daughter and I got empanadas from one of the food stands for lunch, and they were delicious!  (I’m sure partly because they were piping hot and both our outsides and insides were cold!)

On Saturday, we visited Freedom Tower and went up to the One World Observatory.  We’d been to the 9/11 Memorial before, but the 9/11 Museum hadn’t yet opened the last time we were in New York.  Even though we spent a good deal of time there, I felt like there were still things I didn’t see.  It was quite crowded, which made it difficult to navigate through some of the exhibits.  That day still stands out so vividly to me, and it was very moving to be taken back in my mind to those events. 

We popped into Macy’s briefly late Saturday afternoon.  It was beautiful inside, but what a zoo – people everywhere!  We did ride the escalators up to the eighth floor, but no shopping was happening for us there!

We also caught a couple of shows, and just had a wonderful time being together as a family.

Now on to some good posts I found recently.

Cyndi has 10 Small Ways to Bring Peace into Your Home.

Sara tells us How to Thrive When You’re in a Season of Waiting.

Nancy lists 10 Ways to Enjoy Your Kids During Christmas Vacation.

I know a number of families who will be spending their first Christmas without a loved one.  Chara shares words of hope in Christmas Mourning.

I enjoyed Christina’s Farmhouse Plaid Christmas Tour.

And here’s a bit of advice for teenage girls from Samantha Ponder’s Instagram stories that I shared with my daughters.

Hope you have a wonderful weekend!

It’s the Gift We All Need

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Are you doing any dedicated Advent reading leading up to the Christmas season?  I mentioned in a previous post that I’m reading Ann Voskamp’s The Greatest Gift: Unwrapping the Full Love Story of Christmas this month.

Here’s what I read the other day that grabbed my attention.

“Worry is belief gone wrong.  Because you don’t believe that God will get it right.”

Sit with that for a while.  Doesn’t that drill right down into the root of all our worry?

When we worry, we’re basically saying, “God, I don’t trust you with the outcome of this situation.”  We think that we know what’s best – and we’re not sure it’s going to work out that way.  And if God doesn’t do it the way we think it should be done, then we’re convinced it will end badly.

Yes, we know in our heads Romans 8:28, that all things work together for good.  And we know we should be able to trust God with whatever we’re facing.  Yet our human hearts and minds seem hardwired to worry.

But, my sweet friends, we can rest in the knowledge that God will get it right.

It's the original Christmas gift, and it's needed now just as much as it ever was.

We’ve lived long enough to know that hard times will come.  And when they do, we can know that God stands ready to provide for our need.  Here’s what Voskamp goes on to say.

“In the thin air of Advent, you may not even know how to say it out loud: ‘I thought it would be easier.’  And your God comes near:  I will provide the way.

You may not even know who to tell:  ‘I thought it would be different.’  And your God draws close:  I will provide grace for the gaps.

You may not even know how to find words for it:  ‘I thought I would be…more.’  And your God reaches out:  I will provide me.

God gives God.  That is the gift God always ultimately gives.  Because nothing is greater and we have no greater need.”

In this season of giving and receiving, there’s no greater gift than God.  The original Christmas gift, a babe born in a manger, for the purpose of redeeming the world to God, is ours for the taking.

There’s nothing greater we can do than point people to that gift, to Jesus, the One who can meet their every need.  No wrapped box under the tree is worth more than what Jesus gives, salvation to all who believe.

And I love that phrase “grace for the gaps.”  Because sometimes it’s not an overwhelming calamity that I’m facing.  It can be a relatively small struggle.  But even there, His grace can fill in the cracks, meeting me right where I am.

Remember this other Romans 8 verse, number 32?  It says, “He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things?”

We serve a great God who desires to give us every gift that will be good for us and bring glory to Him.  And more of Him is always just what we need.

Related posts:
Unwrap the Gift of Peace This Christmas
Keeping Perspective in the Christmas Season
Are You Getting What You Want for Christmas?

Saturday Salutes ~ A Stress-Free Holiday and Farmhouse Style

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So it’s birthday week around here.  Our oldest daughter (the middle one in the picture) turns 18 today, and our youngest will be 16 on Monday.  I just don’t feel old enough to have children these ages!!  You’re likely familiar with the following quote from Gretchen Rubin, but it’s so true:  “The days are long, but the years are short.”

Here are several good posts I found this past week.

Raluca lists 7 Things That Will Help You Enjoy a Stress-Free Holiday Season.

Ruth has Ideas for Keeping Christ at the Center of Your Christmas.

Joy shares Family Christmas Traditions to Start This Year.

Taryn details Quick and Easy Christmas Table Decor Ideas.

On a non-holiday note, if you like farmhouse style, you’ll enjoy Rhoda’s post highlighting Big Family Little Farmhouse.

Kate talks about what she’s learned as a mom in Seasons of Our Lives.

Hope you have a wonderful weekend!

7 Ways to Prepare Your Heart for Christmas (Especially If You’re Not Feeling It Yet)

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I am solidly on the side of not starting Christmas preparations until Thanksgiving is over.  My girls did manage to sneak in a little Christmas music on the car radio prior to Thanksgiving Day, but I did mildly protest!

Now you may be like my daughters, ready to start celebrating the Christmas season at the beginning of November, and that’s fine.

Regardless, Christmas preparations are now in full swing.  This past weekend we got our live tree, decorated it, and are now asking Alexa to play us Christmas songs every morning.  The wreath is on the door, and the advent calendar is hanging on the wall.

But I’m just not feeling it yet.  I love the tree, and how cozy it makes our house feel.  I’m happy that the stockings are hung.  And I’m not in the throes of gift-buying madness or cookie-baking panic, either.  I just don’t have that Christmas spirit.

If you don't feel that Christmas spirit yet, try one or more of these seven ways to celebrate the season.

We still have a while to get there, but if you’re like me, maybe one of the ways I’ve listed below will help us get our hearts ready for this Christmas season.

1. Read an advent devotional or follow a Christmas-themed Bible reading plan.

I just started Ann Voskamp’s The Greatest Gift: Unwrapping the Full Love Story.  Technically the book starts on December 1st.  However, I know I’ll miss a couple of days somewhere in the month, so I started a few days early.  Other activities like lighting advent candles or decorating a Jesse Tree can help get you in a Christmas frame of mind.

2. Play Christmas music.

I shocked my girls earlier this week when I confessed that I’m not a big fan of Christmas hymns.  They made me feel like I’ve been living a lie all these years, complimenting them on the Christmas piano pieces they’ve played in church or at recitals when I’m not a big fan of the songs, lol!

There are a few traditional hymns that I like, but I also really enjoy songs from Christmas cantatas that I’ve heard performed (an all-time favorite being Ten Thousand Hallelujahs.  Here’s one of the songs.)  The point is, find seasonal music that causes you to think about Jesus’ birth.  (Christmas Grace is a new favorite of mine this year.)  Add in a few fun Christmas tunes, too!

3. Start planning your giving.

Yes, my like-to-be-organized self makes a list of who we’re buying gifts for, how much we plan to spend, and all that good stuff.  But let’s go beyond that.  Who can we bless this Christmas season?  Is there a person you could help that can likely never return the favor?  What about anonymous giving?

Whether we bake cookies, deliver a meal, or find a great deal on a gift we know someone will love, let’s get the focus off of ourselves. We truly receive a bigger blessing when we give rather than when we’re on the receiving end.

4. Find good Christmas entertainment.

Watch A Charlie Brown Christmas, with the kids or by yourself.  Maybe a Hallmark Christmas movie will inspire you.  As a family, listen to a Christmas-related audiobook or read one aloud yourself.

I like The Gift of the Magi by O. Henry and Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol.  This Family Read-Aloud Christmas Treasury looks good, as does Home for Christmas: Stories for Old and Young.  (I think Nikki recommended the second one.)

5. Read the Christmas story in Luke 2 every day between now and December 25th.

Go back to Luke 1 and read the history of Elisabeth and Mary.  Go over to Matthew 1 to read about Joseph, and Matthew 2 for the story of the wise men.  Meditate on the people and events that surrounded the birth of baby Jesus.

6. Write down a list of ten reasons why Jesus being born at Christmas is important to you.

Want help getting started?  Jesus came to earth to be born as a baby because of God’s great love for us.  Because Jesus came to earth and submitted to God’s plan, our sins can be forgiven.  You get the idea.

Once you have your list finished, read through it once a day.

7.  Attend a Christmas-themed event.

Go to a play, a musical, a tree lighting, a parade, a big Christmas lights display, or a concert.  There are likely all kinds of community events in your area centered around Christmas.  See if the Christmas spirit is contagious!

The Christmas season is just getting underway, and I hope you’ll enjoy these next few weeks as we prepare to celebrate Jesus’ birth.

[If you have children, check out these 5 Christmas Bible Verses to Teach Your Children and 10 Gifts from Jesus to Unwrap This Year:  An Object Lesson for Our Children.]

Saturday Salutes ~ and the Books I Read in November

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I couldn’t believe how much color was still on the trees in the NC and TN mountains this week. Just beautiful!!

Christin tells us The Best Way to Love Your Husband.

If you’re planning family photos any time soon, check out these tips from Corina in What to Wear for Family Photos.

Susan shares 7 Important Things I’ve Learned About Parenting Over 46 Years.  Number seven is one that I often need to remember!

Kara has Holiday Gifts to Give Yourself Now That You’ll Thank Yourself for Later.

Tracy tells us How a Professional Organizer Approaches the Holidays.

So I read A LOT of books this month.  Yay for a weeklong vacation with plenty of time in the cabin!

Here were my three non-fiction reads.

Remember God by Annie F. Downs was a really good, quick read.  Annie is very vulnerable in this book as she shares some tender parts of her story.  It was an encouragement to me to continue to trust God whether or not my life is turning out as I thought it would.

From Mom to Me Again by Melissa Shultz was a memoir of this author’s first year as an empty-nester.  It was an interesting read, though I preferred last month’s “empty-nest” read.

Sisters First: Stories from Our Wild and Wonderful Life by Jenna Bush Hager and Barbara Bush was another memoir on my list this month.  I enjoyed reading about some of the “behind-the-scenes” moments, especially related to 9/11, and also their memories of special times with their dad.

Here are the four fiction books I read this month.

I had high hopes for Becoming Mrs. Lewis: The Improbable Love Story of Joy Davidman and C.S. Lewis by Patti Callahan due to lots of positive reviews I’d heard about the book.  Maybe my expectations were too high, but it just wasn’t quite what I was expecting.  Since this was a fiction book, it did inspire me to do some research into Joy Davidman and her relationship with C.S. Lewis.

I enjoyed the mystery in The View from Rainshadow Bay by Colleen Coble.  I’ll likely eventually read the next book in the series.

Farraday Road and Swope’s Ridge by Ace Collins are the first two books in his Lije Evans series.  I got a little lost with all the characters a few times, but overall it was an interesting mystery.  Know that the mystery is not resolved in the first book; it leaves you hanging, and wraps up a bit more neatly in the second one.  There’s a third book as well that I haven’t read yet.

Today is Christmas tree day!  We typically go to a home improvement store and pick out a 6-to-7-foot Fraser fir tree.  Hopefully I can get it decorated in the next couple of days.

Have a wonderful weekend!